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  1. Член BJ_M's Avatar
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    Jul 2002
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    Canada
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    Two Minnesotans walk into a pet shop near Brainerd. They head to the bird section and Sven says to Ole, "Dat's dem." The owner comes over and asks if he can help them. "Yah sure, ve'll take four of dem dere little budgies in dat cage up der."

    The owner puts the budgies in a paper bag. Ole and Sven pay for the birds, leave the shop, and get into Sven's pick-up and drive to the top of some big cliffs near Brainerd Lake. At the cliffs, Sven looks down at the 1000 foot drop and says, "Dis looks like a grand place."

    He takes two birds out of the bag, puts them on his shoulders and jumps off the cliff. Ole watches as Sven falls all the way to the bottom, killing himself dead.

    Looking down at the remains of his best pal, Ole shakes his head and says: "By yumpin' yiminy, dis budgie jumping is too dangerous for me."

    VAIT!!! Dere's MORE!

    Moments later Knute, who's been to the pet shop too, arrives at the cliffs. He walks up to the edge of the cliff carrying another paper bag and a shotgun. "Hey, Ole. Vatch dis." Knute says.

    He takes a parrot from the bag and throws himself over the edge of the cliff. Ole watches as half way down, Knute takes the gun and shoots the parrot and continues to plummet down and down until he hits the bottom and breaks every bone in his body.

    Ole shakes his head and says, "And I'm never trying dat parrotshooting either."

    BUT VAIT!!! Dere's MORE, you betcha!!

    Ole is just getting over the shock of losing two friends when Lars appears. He's also been to the pet shop and is carrying a paper bag and pulls out a chicken. Lars grasps the chicken by the legs, holds it over his head, and hurls himself off the cliff and disappears down and down and hits a rock and breaks his spine.

    Once more Ole shakes his head...."First der was Sven with his budgie jumping, den Knute parrotshooting, and now Lars hengliding ...."
    "Each problem that I solved became a rule which served afterwards to solve other problems." - Rene Descartes (1596-1650)
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  2. Member TaoTeWingChun's Avatar
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    Jan 2005
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    Mahopac, NY
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    BJ_M - You're *killing me* !!!

    Keep 'em coming! The world needs all the laughter it can get - thanks for the break in my routine, it is greatly and gratefully appreciated!

    Cheers!

    TTWC
    "I've got a present for ya!" - TTWC
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  3. Member northcat_8's Avatar
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    Mar 2003
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    Chit, IDK I'm following you
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    you sir have WAY to much time on your hands.
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  4. contrarian rallynavvie's Avatar
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    Sep 2002
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    Minnesotan in Texas
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    We actually call those Yoopers. We don't have many folks that talk like that here in the state, even up on the Iron Range. :P
    FB-DIMM are the real cause of global warming
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  5. Член BJ_M's Avatar
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    Jul 2002
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    Canada
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    i was also thinking also of western UP Mich.. which just about is part of Minnesota anyway ... yea - the iron mountains
    "Each problem that I solved became a rule which served afterwards to solve other problems." - Rene Descartes (1596-1650)
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