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Unfortunately, I am at odds with my wife and there is no end in site.
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Hello,
Man what a tough break.....
All the best man...
Kevin
Donatello - The Shredder? Michelangelo - Maybe all that hardware is for making coleslaw?
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Sorry to hear that zook. How long have you been married?Originally Posted by bazooka
Unfortunately, I am at odds with my wife and there is no end in site.Originally Posted by lordsmurf
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5 yearsOriginally Posted by SLICK RICKSorry to hear that zook. How long have you been married?Originally Posted by bazooka
Unfortunately, I am at odds with my wife and there is no end in site.
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Kids... divorce is toughest on them.
Sorry to hear it ... don't let it be a bitter one.
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Member
- May 2004
- wrong side of the tracks
If God had intended us not to masturbate he would've made our arms shorter.
George Carlin
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Mine was at 20 years when I divorced her. Whatever happens, I wish you luck.Originally Posted by bazooka
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It wouldn't be from spending too much time posting on videohelp, would it?
I've been there myself, but luckily we worked it out.
Hope you can too.
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Hello Ladies
- Jul 2003
- Studio 54
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Been there too (7 years no kids). Bitch started humpy my best friend of 20 years. Needless to say I was almost arrested for putting a gun to their heads
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Dude... gotta write that one up one day in a small tome.Originally Posted by stiltmanBeen there too (7 years no kids). Bitch started humpy my best friend of 20 years. Needless to say I was almost arrested for putting a gun to their heads
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Been there, done that....Originally Posted by bazooka
Unfortunately, I am at odds with my wife and there is no end in site.
I wish you well,
makntraksIn the theater of the mind...
It's always good to know where the exits are...
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At least since your unemployed right now you might get real lucky and get a really low alimony/child support payment.
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...or you could file for supportOriginally Posted by zzyzzx
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Master of Time & Space
- Feb 2004
- Denver, CO United States
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Bazooka,
I'm genuinely sorry to hear that. Marriage is not an easy thing to keep afloat. I've been over rocky terrain myself and it's constant work to keep it healthy.
A few things that have helped me:
1) Drop the male ego down a notch. Not all comments were intended the way they sounded. Don't jump to conclusions. I do this all the time ...and always regret it.
2) Keep the temper in check when having a discussion. It almost always makes it worse because hurtful things are said.
3) It sounds corny, but get out old pictures of her, or something special she gave you, and remember how you felt about her when you were dating. Sometimes a memory jog can really help.
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Cappy... outstanding comments for all us married folks....
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Master of Time & Space
- Feb 2004
- Denver, CO United States
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learned the hard way, my friend. Learned the hard wayOriginally Posted by Dr. DOS
Thanks Dr. Dos
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...unless that "something special" was herpes.Originally Posted by Capmaster
3) It sounds corny, but get out old pictures of her, or something special she gave you,
Just a thought.
C'mon people! It's a bad situation. I little levity never hurts.
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Member
- Nov 2002
- Victoria, British Columbia, Canada
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Really sorry to hear this Bazooka - best of luck.
If it does happen and even while you're still together - really try not to say anything bad about your spouce in front of the kids. Tough to do but you'll both (and the kids) will bennefit years down the road.
I was lucky with my divorce (in that we had no kids) but my wife/step daughter is still in contact with the ex. Wife will never say anything negative while in front of daughter. It's really helped with the daughter / father (hers) relationship - daughter travels to visit his new family about twice a year.
Once again - good luck.
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Married 17 years to my 1st wife. Always thought divorce was for quitters -- but sometimes no matter how much work you put into it people just grow apart. Both parties have to want it to work and make the appropriate adjustments that they can live with.
Bazooka -- give it your all and try everything you can to salvage the relationship. On the other hand be realistic and know when you've done all you can. If you can look at yourself in the mirror and honestly say you have done all you can and explored every aveneue to save the marriage, then it is time to look at moving on.
I was faithful, attentive, honest, caring and had no vices. She was never happy and blamed me for her unhappiness. I finally realized realised that she was just not happy with herself but always wanted to blame me. She expected me to make changes, but would never entertain the possibility that perhaps she too needed to make some changes.
I am at peace with myself knowing I did everything humanly possible. I have found an amazing women and have been married to her for 7 years. I am happier than I have ever been. I had to go through hell to get to heaven !!
Good luck, man !!
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Member
- Nov 2002
- Victoria, British Columbia, Canada
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Well said Ripper.
It's amazing reading through these notes and finding how similar some of our experiences have been. You're not alone Bazooka...
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That's funny ... I heard it was because she wasn't "into" the whole black tape scene ...Originally Posted by Ripper2860
sorry, in bad taste, I know ... but I had to lighten the mood ...
I'm not married so I don't feel "qualified" to give any real meaningful advice, but I will say this:
You two have both shared something special over firstly your courting period, and secondly, your marriage period. You have invested, time, money and feelings into this relationship for 2. You need to decide if the "hiccups" ATM are serious enough to consider throwing all that away. I have always thought that honesty is the best policy, and I would advocate that if you feel like it's worth saving, to both sit down and discuss exactly how you're feeling, why this is so and what possible things can be done to rectify the situation in a rational and calm manner.
The most important thing to remember that this is not a blame session, and that while you both may disagree with what the other is saying, bite your tongue until the other person has had their fair go. If this fails, maybe marriage counselling might help also ?
Whatever happens zook, be positive. Behind every cloud is a silver lining, so while it may cause heartbreak now, it could work out to be the best decision of your life in the long run - and I mean that whichever way it goes.
Head up, pal
If in doubt, Google it.
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Originally Posted by jimmalenko
That's funny ... I heard it was because she wasn't "into" the whole black tape scene ... Well --- that was one of the things. Yeah -- she was a high maintainance "Fuschia Designer Tape" kinda girl and I was a easy going "Basic Black Tape" kinda guy.
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Bazooka sell everything in your house to a friend for $1.
Then split that with her........
Am I bitter??? No just hateful.....
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Been there. Sucks. But there is an end to the heartbreak.
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Marriage counseling. Seriously. If you're a member of a church or can get a recommendation for a good counselor, you should try it. If both of you are willing, that is.
Sometimes what it takes to get people to see the bigger picture is to have a third party spell out what will be lost, and the disruption and distress involved, etc.
All couples go through bad times. ALL of them.
Sounds really trite, doesn't it? Hope you work it out.
P.S. Early on in our marriage, when we were starting a real knock-down, drag-out fight, I stopped and said: "We can't do this every time", and left for several hours. Next day, we agreed to retreat to "neutral corners" when either of us were pissy. Been working well for many years now. It helps if your house is really big.
Pull! Bang! Darn!
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Not married...but on the verge of it. Been with my girl for 3 years (Not that long really but she moved in after only 2 months) BUT in those 3 years we haven't spent a day apart. That added to our recent tension, and I've been spending more time with friends now...but like Ripper...
...that's where I am right now. She now knows things have gotta change to make things work. If she isn't willing to make changes, or to meet "half-way" so that we can both be happy, then it's time to find another beaver.Originally Posted by Ripper2860
Best of like to ya zook!!Smile
Smile
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God damn......this is depressing. I've been crazy excited all week because i finally got this girl to go out on a date with me on saturday night....now i'm worried it's gonna turn into something unpleasant.
I hope someone here has some good stories to tell.
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I'm on the verge of getting married. August 6th, to my g/f of 4 years. Just trying to share a good story, so the poster above me doesn't get too depressed.
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thanksOriginally Posted by adamthole
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Bazooka,
That really sucks. I've been married for 16 years, and things don't get much better as time goes by. Most of my friends envy me because my wife travels quite a bit. And I suppose that's why we stay married, 'cause if she was home all the time, we'd probably despise each other. So maybe its for the best. And think of all the fun you're going to have at the gentlemans club near the airport. (Every city has one by the airport, don't they?)
Keep you head high.
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