Even xxx wouldn't do this... I think...

[zzyzzx]

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/main.jhtml?xml=/news/2007/10/26/nsex126.xml

Man who had sex with bike in court
Last Updated: 1:21pm BST 26/10/2007


A man has been placed on the sex offenders’ register after being caught trying to have sex with a bicycle.

Robert Stewart was discovered in his room by two cleaners at the Aberley House Hostel in Ayr, south west Scotland, in October last year.

On Wednesday Mr Stewart admitted to sexual breach of the peace in Ayr Sheriff Court, where depute fiscal Gail Davidson described how he had been found by the hostel workers.

She said: "They knocked on the door several times and there was no reply.

"They used a master key to unlock the door and they then observed the accused wearing only a white T-shirt, naked from the waist down.

"The accused was holding the bike and moving his hips back and forth as if to simulate sex."

Both witnesses, who were extremely shocked, notified the hotel manager, who in turn alerted the police.

Mr Stewart was placed on the sex offenders’ register but his sentence was deferred until next month.

He is not the first man to be convicted of a sexual offence involving an inanimate object, however.

Karl Watkins, an electrician, was jailed for having sex with pavements in Redditch, Worcs, in 1993.

Don't be offensive towards other members, even if they're not around very often. Thanks!
/ Cobra

[thecoalman]

Disturbing but not sure why that would be considered a crime.

[rallynavvie]

Karl Watkins, an electrician, was jailed for having sex with pavements in Redditch, Worcs, in 1993.

[hudsonf]

Disturbing but not sure why that would be considered a crime.

The bike was under age.

[BJ_M]

exactly == it is weird, but no crime and now he is on a registry list !

[Heywould3]

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/main.jhtml?xml=/news/2007/10/26/nsex126.xml

Man who had sex with bike in court
Last Updated: 1:21pm BST 26/10/2007

She said: "They knocked on the door several times and there was no reply.

thats the problem. she SAID. even if she did. do you ever answer the door when having sex? i have kids and when they knock for the most part we dont reply. never answer phone door etc? ( i may watch tv if its taking to long) lol..

how is it wrong to have sex with a bike? or anything that isnt alive or ever was alive? next thing they will start aresting adolesent boys for wet dreams saying they were having sex with air or their underware or some crap. this world is messed up..

All this reminds me of a joke or a line i heard cant remember.. but its like this

this guy is talking to a friend and he mentions that he goes to the sperm bank once a month and gets 50bux to toss off in a little cup.. the guy hes talking to says damn 50 bux.. i have a towel at home that must be worth a mint then....

[zzyzzx]

Karl Watkins, an electrician, was jailed for having sex with pavements in Redditch, Worcs, in 1993.

I was also wondering pavements is some sort of slang word for something. Either that or he was humping concrete. Sounds painful.

[thecoalman]

Maybe it was a crack.

[MOVIEGEEK]

Does this mean he can't go near a bicycle shop? :P

[KBeee]

Obviously a Pedalphile

But joking aside, I can't see how in the privacy (he thought) of a locked room using something as a masturbation aid qualifies you as a sex offender, unless there's some obscure Scottish law about morals or something.

[Webster]

Obviously a Pedalphile

[SquirrelDip]

I guess it's back to the sheep for him.