Your mamma is so fat...
when she dances, she makes the band skip.
when she was diagnosed with the flesh eating disease, the doctors gave her 13 years to live.
she puts mayonnaise on aspirin.
her ass has its own congressman.
her cereal bowl came with a lifeguard.
when she goes to the zoo, the elephants throw her peanuts.
her high school graduation picture is an aerial photograph.
her driver's license says, "Picture continued on back."
the back of her neck looks like a pack of hotdogs.
all of the restaurants in town have signs that say, "Maximum Occupancy:240 people OR your mamma."
when she ran away, they had to use all four sides of the milk carton.
when she gets into an elevator, it HAS to go down.
she was born with a silver shovel in her mouth.
she's got smaller fat women orbiting around her.
I had to take a train and two buses just to get on her good side.
they had to grease a door frame and hold a Twinkie on the other side to get her through.
her nickname is "DAAAAMN!"
she has to iron her pants on the driveway.
she's on BOTH sides of the family.
she could sell shade.
when she crosses the street, the cars look out for her.
people jog around her for exercise.
she gets runs in her jeans.
her blood type is Ragu.
when she goes to a restaurant, she doesn't get a menu, she gets an estimate.
if she got her shoes shined, she'd have to take his word for it!
she has to put her belt on with a boomerang.
when she turns around people throw her a welcome back party.
she can't even jump to a conclusion
she went to the movies and sat next to everyone.
her belly button doesn't have lint, it has sweaters.
when she was walking down the street, I swerved to miss her and ran out of gas.
it takes her two trips to haul ass.
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Originally Posted by krazydl
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Your momma so fat...
She sat on a dollar bill and made 4 quarters
her toilet has a bench seat
Jenny Craig gave her a group discount
Her Nike Shocks are Monroe heavy duties
If you put clown make up on her, capmaster would still do her... -
Originally Posted by northcat_8
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Yo' momma so nasty... she made Right Guard turn left!
Cobra -
Yo momma so fat when she goes to the Kentucky Fried Chicken she licks other peoples fingers....LMfAo! I think that's how it goes....
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Sorry about the delay...I had to work for a minute...
Your momma so fat....
her ass looks like 2 white hogs fighting over a milk dud
her bed is on a foundation
her cereal bowl is a trough
when I see her jogging I get motion sickness
she uses a sheep for a tampon
....Grrrrr....have to work again.....
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A friend of mine is obsessed w/ "your mamma" jokes so I've heard so many of these...
Your mama is so fat...
when she walked into burger king the guy at the regester said "can i take your orderS please?"
when she puts on red everyone says "hey Koolaid"
he went into outer space and clogged up a black hole
when her beeper went off, people thought she was backing up
she eats Wheat Thicks
when she bungee jumps, she brings down the bridge too
when she wore a shirt with an AA on it, people thought it was American Airlines biggest jet.
she puts on her lipstick with a paint-roller
when she sits around the house, she SITS AROUND THE HOUSE
she's got her own area code
And my favorite...your mama is so fat when she gets on the scale it says to be continued -
And my favorite...your mama is so fat when she gets on the scale it says to be continued
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... she wears the equator as a belt.
Want my help? Ask here! (not via PM!)
FAQs: Best Blank Discs • Best TBCs • Best VCRs for capture • Restore VHS -
She breaks her leg and gravy comes out.
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Your momma is so fat, when I got done DOIN her, I rolled over to get off her, rolled over again, and yet again, AND I WAS STILL ON THE BITCH!
If at first you don't succeed; call it version 1.0 -
Your mama so fat...
she has to wake up in sections
she brushes her teeth with crisco
that dare devils perform shows where they jump her....none have survived
she was a guest on Jerry Springer, but was the ony own who could fit on the stage
she has more chins than China Town
when she goes to the beach, she's the only own who gets a tan
She uses Lake Erie as a water bed
she fought Godzilla in the third sequel
she farted and a slab of cow shot out -
Your momma's so fat that when you finally get on top of her your ears pop!
Your momma's so fat she got to wear two watches 'cause she covers two time zones! -
Your mamma so fat...
...Colonial bread is no longer in the Guiness Book of World Records for producing the most rolls, your mamma is now number 1
...she could feed all of America with the cottege cheese in her thighs
...when she gave birth sixteen 20 year olds walked out
...when her water broke it flooded the city -
Originally Posted by Capmaster
Yo mama so ugly, when she looks in the mirror, the reflection looks back and shakes its head :P -
Originally Posted by krazydl
put her in an incubator with tinted windows. -
Originally Posted by Capmaster
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Originally Posted by krazydl
LMAO
Yo mama's so fat she jumped off the Grand Canyon and got stuck -
Originally Posted by Capmaster
.....just one more,
Yo momma so fat I've known her all my life ... and I still haven't seen ALL of her!
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