The HouseWife's Role

[Doramius]

This was sent to me from one of my friends. 13 May, 1955 Housekeeping Monthly. The article was also written by a woman journalist that May. I bet she got a good promotion.

The picture was just too big in file size and I had too much trouble trying to compress it so here's the article's picture and below is what it says.

The good wife' guide
-Have Dinner ready. Plan ahead, even the night before, to have a delicious meal ready, on time for his return. This is a way of letting him know that you have been thinking about him and are concerned about his needs. Most men are hungry when they come home and the prospect of a good meal (especially his favorite dish) is part of the warm welcome needed.
-Prepare yourself. Take 15 minutes to rest so you'll be refreshed when he arrives. touch up your make-up, put a ribbon in your hair and be fresh-looking. He has just been with a lot of work-weary people.
-Be a little gay and a little more interesting for him. His boring day may need a lift and one of your duties is to provide it.
-Clear away the clutter. Make one last trip through the main part of the house just before your husband arrives.
-Gather up schoolbooks, toys, paper etc. and then run a dustcloth over the tables.
-Over the cooler months of the year you should prepare and light a fire for him to unwind by. Your husband will feel he has reached a haven of rest and order, and it will give you a lift too. After all, catering for his comfort will provide you with immense personal satisfaction.
-Prepare the children. Take a few minutes to wash the children's hands and faces (if they are small), comb their hair and, if necessary, change their clothes. They are little treasures and he would like to see them playing the part. Minimise all noise. At the time of his arrival, eliminate all noise of the washer, dryer or vacuum. Try to encourage the children to be quiet.
-Be happy to see him.
-Greet him with a warm smile and show sincerity in your desire to please him.
-Listen to him. You may have a dozen important things to tell him, but the moment of his arrival is not the time. Let him talk first - remember, his topics of conversation are more important than yours.
-Make the evening his. Never complain if he comes home late or goes out to dinner, or other places of entertainment without you. Instead, try to understand his world of strain and pressureand his very real need to be at home and relax.
-Your goal: Try to make sure your home is a place of peace, order and tranquillity where your husband can renew himself in body and spirit.
-Don't greet him with complaints and problems.
-Don't complain if he's late home for dinner or even if he stays out all night. Count this as minor compared to what he might have gone through that day.
-Make him comfortable. Have him lean back in a comfortable chair or have him lie down in the bedroom. Have a cool or warm drink for him.
-Arrange his pillow and offer to take off his shoes. Speak in a low, soothing and pleasant voice.
-Don't ask him questions about his judgement or integrity. Remember, he is the master of the house and as such will always exercise his will with fairness and truthfulness. You have no right to question him.
-A good wife always knows her place.

[DVD_Ripper]

Links seems broken... or is it me ...

[Doramius]

it was too big. I'm going to try and shrink it down.

EDIT: It's fixed now.

[Capmaster]

Hey Doramius - I have a copy of it:

Taken from "Housekeeping Monthly" -- May 13, 1955 --
Edit: <removed text body>
Ahhhhh yes ......the good old days
Just exactly when did we lose control men?

[northcat_8]

when we gave them the right to vote.

[tekkieman]

...and Ward, June, Wally, and the Beav lived happily ever after.

If my wife saw this, she wouldn't make it through number two before I found the parchment firmly implanted in my ass!

[Doramius]

Thanks cap. I also cut and pasted and placed the clipping in the original post. I'm undecided to which part I like the most. I think it's a tie with the last 2.

[Capmaster]

Thanks cap. I also cut and pasted and placed the clipping in the original post. I'm undecided to which part I like the most. I think it's a tie with the last 2.

Great. I'll edit it out of my post so the thread is shorter

My favorite:
Listen to him. You may have a dozen important things to tell him, but the moment of his arrival is not the time. Let him talk first - remember, his topics of conversation are more important than yours.

[thayne]

Ah the good 'ol days....

All I want from a wife is for her to feed me, clean the house and keep my knob well polished

[Capmaster]

Ah the good 'ol days....

All I want from a wife is for her to feed me, clean the house and keep my knob well polished

That pretty much sums it up doesn't it? And the women complain that we're hard to understand ....just give us those three things and we'll be happy to name them as our beneficiaries

[DVD_Ripper]

Hmmm, I wonder what my wife will say when I forward her the text in an email. Could be rather interesting :P

Edit ** -- ok sent to my wife. If I am not online tomorrow am consider myself deceased and call the police

[Capmaster]

Hmmm, I wonder what my wife will say when I forward her the text in an email. Could be rather interesting :P

If you could catch it on video for the rest of us ......that would be nice

[DVD_Ripper]

Hmmm, I wonder what my wife will say when I forward her the text in an email. Could be rather interesting :P

If you could catch it on video for the rest of us ......that would be nice

She is always home before me... so I will use the following on her tomorrow when she tries to tell me something upon my arrival.

Listen to him. You may have a dozen important things to tell him, but the moment of his arrival is not the time. Let him talk first - remember, his topics of conversation are more important than yours.

[Capmaster]

Hmmm, I wonder what my wife will say when I forward her the text in an email. Could be rather interesting :P

If you could catch it on video for the rest of us ......that would be nice

She is always home before me... so I will use the following on her tomorrow when she tries to tell me something upon my arrival.

Listen to him. You may have a dozen important things to tell him, but the moment of his arrival is not the time. Let him talk first - remember, his topics of conversation are more important than yours.

That one was my favorite too. It'd make a nice sig, don't you think?

[joecav]

Hate to be the bearer of potentially bad news, but it seems this is a fake...
LINKY

Although it is undetermined, it sounds fishy!!!

[Capmaster]

Hate to be the bearer of potentially bad news, but it seems this is a fake...
LINKY

Although it is undetermined, it sounds fishy!!!

The link points to a high school home economics article and the text isn't the same as the magazine. Could still be a hoax, but it doesn't seem that far-fetched

[joecav]

The link points to a high school home economics article and the text isn't the same as the magazine. Could still be a hoax, but it doesn't seem that far-fetched

Scroll to the very bottom, same image referenced...still funny tho..

[Doramius]

DVD_Ripper, let us all say our goodbye's now because we might not have the chance tomorrow.

Flan's new signature will read: "Their names were Teegee420 and DVD_Ripper.

[Doramius]

I think this was meant mostly for women, but you see what years of letting women be like men or having their own opinion does to society.

The Good Housekeeping Way #1
Stuff a miniature marshmallow in the bottom of a sugar cone to prevent ice cream drips.

The Real Women's Way
Just suck the ice cream out of the bottom of the cone, for God's sake. You are probably lying on the couch with your feet up eating it anyway.
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The Good Housekeeping Way #2
To keep potatoes from budding, place an apple in the bag with the potatoes.

The Real Women's Way
Buy Smash mashed potato mix and keep it in the pantry for up to a year.
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The Good Housekeeping Way #3
When a cake recipe calls for flouring the baking tin, use a bit of the dry cake mix instead and there won't be any white mess on the outside of the cake.

The Real Women's Way
The Cheese Cake Shop sell cakes. They even do decorated versions.
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The Good Housekeeping Way #4
If you accidentally over-salt a dish while it's still cooking, drop in a potato slice.

The Real Women's Way
If you over salt a dish while you are cooking, that's tough, Please recite with me the Real Women's motto: "I made it and you will eat it and I don't care how bad it tastes."
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The Good Housekeeping Way #5
Wrap celery in aluminum foil when putting in the refrigerator and it will keep for weeks.

The Real Women's Way
It could keep forever. I don't eat it.
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The Good Housekeeping Way #6
Brush some beaten egg white over pie crust before baking to yield beautiful glossy finish.

The Real Women's Way
Sara Lee frozen pie directions do not include brushing any egg whites over the crust so I don't do that.
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The Good Housekeeping Way #7
Cure for headaches: Take a lime, cut it in half and rub it on your forehead. The throbbing will go away.

The Real Women's Way
Cure for headaches: Take a lime, cut it in half and drop it in 8 ounces of tequila. Drink the Tequila. You might still have the headache, but at least you will be too drunk to give a hoot!
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The Good Housekeeping Way #8
If you have a problem opening jars, try using latex dishwashing gloves. They give a non-slip grip that makes opening jars easy.

The Real Women's Way
Go ask mister tight-arse, cutelegs, single neighbor to do it for you.
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The Good Housekeeping Way #9
Freeze leftover wine into ice cubes for future use in casseroles and sauces.

The Real Women's Way
Leftover wine?????

[northcat_8]

Ah the good 'ol days....

All I want from a wife is for her to feed me, clean the house and keep my knob well polished

Well then for God's sake do not get married.

"for her to feed me" - absolutely the first purchase has to be a microwave. Otherwise you'll starve.

"clean the house" - depends on the girl. My wife is a neat freak and I drive her insane because if he venitian blinds are not mathematically parallel to the floor and to each other...I'm OK with it. Just becareful what you wish for....some carry it too far.

"keep knob well polished" - You better use liquid turtle wax instead of hand lotion when you whack off then. You know why a bride is smiling? Because she knows she's given her last BJ. Also beware of the wedding cake...it has been proven to be a sexual appetite supressor for women. You will most certainly reach a time (about 3 months in to marriage) when your wife will begin to study pussy-conservationalism...how you handle that situation is critical to your sex life for the rest of your life.

A man marries a woman thinking she will never change and she always does. A woman marries a man thinking he will change and he never will.

And before you go getting into looking for a wife...think about this. When you go out on the town, do you have more fun going out with your friends or do you have more fun going out with a girlfriend?

The whole god damn problem is that no one seems to understand everything except sex you can do by yourself. You can wash your own clothes, You can cook, You can clean, you can even bitch at yourself for not putting something back in it's assigned position...but you can't **** yourself. Hell if a man could lick himself like a dog can then 99% of us wouldn't even get off the ******* couch.

[tekkieman]

blah, blah, blah.... Hell if a man could lick himself like a dog can then 99% of us wouldn't even get off the ******* couch.

Didn't Ron Jeremy do that in a movie when some girl told him to go **** himself?

[D_Knife]

Quite a few movies, it was one of his "talents"
I bet he couldn't do it nowdays though!

[thayne]

I spammed this to everyone I know, even women (except for my Mom of course). LOL

[flaninacupboard]

Ah the good 'ol days....

All I want from a wife is for her to feed me, clean the house and keep my knob well polished

Well then for God's sake do not get married.

"for her to feed me" - absolutely the first purchase has to be a microwave. Otherwise you'll starve.

"clean the house" - depends on the girl. My wife is a neat freak and I drive her insane because if he venitian blinds are not mathematically parallel to the floor and to each other...I'm OK with it. Just becareful what you wish for....some carry it too far.

"keep knob well polished" - You better use liquid turtle wax instead of hand lotion when you whack off then. You know why a bride is smiling? Because she knows she's given her last BJ. Also beware of the wedding cake...it has been proven to be a sexual appetite supressor for women. You will most certainly reach a time (about 3 months in to marriage) when your wife will begin to study pussy-conservationalism...how you handle that situation is critical to your sex life for the rest of your life.

A man marries a woman thinking she will never change and she always does. A woman marries a man thinking he will change and he never will.

And before you go getting into looking for a wife...think about this. When you go out on the town, do you have more fun going out with your friends or do you have more fun going out with a girlfriend?

The whole god damn problem is that no one seems to understand everything except sex you can do by yourself. You can wash your own clothes, You can cook, You can clean, you can even bitch at yourself for not putting something back in it's assigned position...but you can't **** yourself. Hell if a man could lick himself like a dog can then 99% of us wouldn't even get off the ******* couch.

Nooooooo, much better if someone cooks for you. i get my lunch cooked for me every day and i really appreciate it. had toad in the hole with mash, peas, gravy and home grown carrots yesterday:

And i thought wives were obligated to a blowjob twice a year, birthday and anniversary?

[Ripper2860]

Just exactly when did we lose control men?

When we men transferred ultimate power from our brains to our DICKS and women discovered the power of the PUSSY.

'Twas truly a sad day for manhood!


Shut up and make me a sandwich !!!

[Capmaster]

...had toad in the hole with mash, peas, gravy and home grown carrots yesterday

Either that's an egg fried in a cutout in some toast, or it's something northcat might have invented Am I warm?

And there are really three stages of marriage, sex-wise: The first ten years you have to beg her. The second ten years she has to beg you. The third ten years neither of you can remember what all the fuss was about

[DVD_Ripper]

DVD_Ripper, let us all say our goodbye's now because we might not have the chance tomorrow.

Flan's new signature will read: "Their names were Teegee420 and DVD_Ripper.

Well.... wife's at work... right about now... reading my email to her.... hmmm... no phone call yet... but, wait, I see a delivery man heading my way with a certified letter of sorts ... Well, I may be doing tonites contributions to this forum from the local YMCA

[Capmaster]

DVD_Ripper, let us all say our goodbye's now because we might not have the chance tomorrow.

Flan's new signature will read: "Their names were Teegee420 and DVD_Ripper.

Well.... wife's at work... right about now... reading my email to her.... hmmm... no phone call yet... but, wait, I see a delivery man heading my way with a certified letter of sorts ... Well, I may be doing tonites contributions to this forum from the local YMCA

Do you wanna borrow Dolly?

[DVD_Ripper]

No, thank you for thinking of me .... I will change the shipping of my Abyss Doll that should be shipping today or tomorrow

[flaninacupboard]

...had toad in the hole with mash, peas, gravy and home grown carrots yesterday

Either that's an egg fried in a cutout in some toast, or it's something northcat might have invented Am I warm?

And there are really three stages of marriage, sex-wise: The first ten years you have to beg her. The second ten years she has to beg you. The third ten years neither of you can remember what all the fuss was about

Toad in the hole is long pork sausages cooked in a dish of batter. the batter rises and is fluffy in the middle and crispy on the outside. it is damn gorgeous with gravy. mash is obviously mashed potato, hopefully you know what peas and carrots are. think next time i'll ask for onion gravy mmmmmm

I thought the third stage was when you both finally agreed you wanted it, but you can no longer get it up??