let's hear some limericks

[Red96TA]

Thought this would be a fun one...let's here some limericks.


There once was a man named Dave.
Who found a dead whore in a cave.
Missing one t1t, smelled like sh1t,
Think of the money he saved...


I KNOW Jeex has a couple...lol :P

[tgpo]

I once was a member of this site
until one day I got banned outright
I fought and fussed, I whined and cussed
all because of a political fight

[gll99]

There once was a mod with a mac
His friends he forgot he lost track
it's ok if you joke
but watch out when you poke
or you may get a dear f.u back

[tgpo]

There use to be a group called the MPAA
who would release movies in countries with a long delay
the members fought back, threw out the man jack
and the people rejoiced all day

[gll99]

There once was a noob with a writer
Wanted quarters much larger and brighter
Made a mint selling copies
but got caught by the bobbies
now his new cellblock digs are much tighter

[gll99]

Here's a couple more I made up:

A girl and a guy in a bar
Said they wanted to buy a new car
t'was of sport cars he dreamed
but she said with eyes gleamed
There's another arrival not far

and for a buddy here:

Once a guy on this site wanted fun
And he was pretty good with a pun
many members he jested
and most of them bested
but one fella named George had a gun

[tito13kfm]

There once was a man from nantucket...


I think you all know the rest.

[holistic]

.............

He said with a grin as he wipe off is chin

...........

[gll99]

Here's my social commentary on the Jacksons.

Michael Jackson may look like a mime
but he speaks like a child learning prime
Some believe he can stay
in his Neverland way
Others think he deserves to do time

Janet's halftime made a great by-line
At the grammies they said she could not shine
What the heck did they see
with that nickel falsie
I saw more from the girls on the sideline

That's it. I'm going to bed.

[sterno]

There once was a maid from Madras
Who had a magnificent ass.
Not rounded and pink
As you probably think,
It was gray, had long ears, and ate grass.


There once was a queer from Khartoum
Who took a lesbian up to his room.
They argued all night
About who had the right
To do what, with which, and to whom.


A bather whose clothing was strewed
By breezes that left her quite nude,
Saw a man come along
And, unless I'm quite wrong,
You expected this line to be lewd.