Have you guys heard about this?

[doppletwo]

http://www.weeklyworldnews.com/features/aliens/61244

[zzyzzx]

ALIENS CLAIM JACKO IS THEIR SON
And they want him back!



AN ALIEN couple, who claim to be Michael Jackson's real parents are suing Earth for full custody of him, says a man who claims to be an attorney for the ETs.

"My clients want him back immediately," says lawyer Bentley Leavent, 39. "They are disgusted and appalled at his life here and want him to come home now."

The self-proclaimed "King of Pop" was born in a galaxy far, far away on a planet named Zertonia -- too distant for even our mightiest telescopes to see, explains the California legal eagle.

His parents, who are named in court papers as Mr. and Mrs. Zortron, were only teenagers and not equipped to deal with the rigors of bringing up a child when they gave him up 46 years ago.

"Mr. Zortron was just beginning his four-year training to become a flying saucer mechanic," says Leavent.

"He was still living at his folks' house. They planned to wed when he graduated.

"They really loved little Michael, or Kerz-na, as they called him. But they felt it would be best if he were placed with parents who were more secure, mature people who would raise him with good, solid values and give him the moral background he needed to raise a family of his own someday."

But, the lawyer alleges, the alien couple were shocked to discover the Zertonian adoption broker had shipped their son to Earth.

They were even more concerned when they flew down here and got a peek at him frolicking at the Neverland Ranch.

"We were most displeased," they say in the lawsuit, filed in Los Angeles.

"Kerz-na doesn't even look like an Earthling. His face is terrifying, even to us.

"Kerz-na was placed on a stage at a very early age and told to perform. This yelling and jumping around has clearly damaged his brain. He doesn't even live in a proper home! It's some kind of children's amusement park with monkeys.

"He needs our help. We're not blaming anyone. If anyone is to blame it's us for giving him away. His mother is heartbroken." Mr. and Mrs. Zortron say they won't make trouble for the Jackson family. They just want their baby back.

"The Zortron's are quite sure that Michael's family will send him back to Zertonia with no problem," says Leavent, who is reportedly the subject of a Bar Association investigation for making "highly dubious claims related to the practice of law."

According to the lawsuit, Mr. Zortron says as soon as custody is granted he will be on the first space ship to Earth to take his son home and make him a real man.

"Kerz-na already has a job lined up at my flying saucer garage," he explains. "Those guys won't put up with any of the nonsense he's gotten away with on Earth!"

[zzyzzx]

I thought this story was much better:
http://www.weeklyworldnews.com/features/sex/61265

[sacajaweeda]

So dangling kids from a balcony and using young male children for jack rags is an alien thing is it?

[Darth Paris]

With that kind of news I am definatley going to subscribe.

[BJ_M]

not entirely impossible i suppose ...

[northcat_8]

Now this is just my opinion and I may be alone here but....

They can fuckin have him

[Cobra]

Now, now northcat. Without Jackson to pick on, the tabloids would go out of business.

[northcat_8]

You know it's pretty bad when not even black people will defend him.

Not a racial comment, but typically when a member of any ethnic group is being torn to shreds or wronged in the media, other members of that group will come to their defense. Even Al Sharptin and the NAACP said "NO way" on this one.

Michael can't even get his family to defend him

[Cobra]

Poor guy.

I'm not a fan, and I don't have feelings either way about the case. I just think it should be settled quickly for him, so all this will stop.

[northcat_8]

I'm not a fan either. But he's brought it on his self.

That guy is way out there on the edge of an alternate reality.

[BJ_M]

does anyone remember he converted to a certain religious group (im keeping the name out to avoid a religious debate) -- one of which usually stands by their own in many cases....

i'm surprised not a mention of this has come up ...

[doppletwo]

The unmentioned group kicked him out. Jackson just didn't mesh well with them.

I hear Jackson will join the Jedi, they are OK with this sort of thing.

"Sleep I did not, with those boys"
--Yoda (the little green muppet not Yoda313)

[yoda313]

Hello,

Sleep I did not, with those boys"
--Yoda (the little green muppet not Yoda313)

Thanks for the clarification :P :P

Kevin

[MOVIEGEEK]

Who's crazier...Michael Jackson or the fans hanging around the courthouse in Santa Barbara?

[canadateck]

does anyone remember he converted to a certain religious group (im keeping the name out to avoid a religious debate) -- one of which usually stands by their own in many cases....

i'm surprised not a mention of this has come up ...

Do you mean here on the board? beacuse I know they were backing him,Not sure if they still are.

[BJ_M]

does anyone remember he converted to a certain religious group (im keeping the name out to avoid a religious debate) -- one of which usually stands by their own in many cases....

i'm surprised not a mention of this has come up ...

Do you mean here on the board? beacuse I know they were backing him,Not sure if they still are.

no - not on this board, i dont think he has much support here

[canadateck]

i'm surprised not a mention of this has come up ...

With this I meant Here.

[BJ_M]

ahh HERE, vs. down under there or over there yonder.. Or worse over the rainbow ...

[BJ_M]

he is going to need a pot of gold soon based on what some say though ..

[canadateck]

Maybe Peter Pan will come and wisk Him away to Never -Never Land Or whatever land that is.

[BJ_M]

but thats were he lives already ....

[canadateck]

I wounder How the Guys In jail will treat him? or maybe thay will send him to a juvenile facility.

[sacajaweeda]

Jacko will have the Nation of I**** for a rolling posse if he goes to the clink. The biggest baddest brothas in the place are gonna be gettin' paid to watch his back. As long as he don't run out of money he'll be safer than the warden. The day the money stops though he's a dead man.

[BJ_M]

Jacko will have the Nation of I**** for a rolling posse if he goes to the clink. The biggest baddest brothas in the place are gonna be gettin' paid to watch his back. As long as he don't run out of money he'll be safer than the warden. The day the money stops though he's a dead man.

why ?

he was a member of a well known church based in salt lake city ....

or maybe he switched -- dammed if i can follow his stuff ....


don't answer or this will be a religion debate ...

[MOVIEGEEK]

He was a member of that faith that goes knocking on peoples doors and hands out the booklet "The Watchtower".
Not that there's anything wrong with that.

[Shocker Milwaukee]

He was a member of that faith that goes knocking on peoples doors and hands out the booklet "The Watchtower".
Not that there's anything wrong with that.

I think that was his parents' choice.

He's been hooked up with Minister Farrakhan & The Nation for a while now.