Cuban Missile Crisis.

[Anonymoususer]

The Cuban Missile Crisis was the closest the world ever came to nuclear war due to conflict between the Soviet Union and the United States. The crisis began due to many reason’s as well as background reasons, which consisted of, the failure of the Bay of Pigs, Cuba’s fear of invasion by the U.S, United States fear of the spread of communism and the Soviets fear of losing the Arms Race. During this time the Arms Race was heating up, and Soviet Union saw itself losing the race which would make there nation look weak, consequently they became desperate and found an alternate way to win. The Soviet Union feared that American technology on weapons was superior and since the Russian nuclear weapons were short-range while the American missiles were long range, and also accurate, America could potentially fire on the Soviets and hit.

The Soviet Premier, Nikita Khrushchev, thought that placing Soviet medium range missiles in Cuba could easily solve problems. This deployment would double the Soviet arsenal and protect Cuba from US invasion. Khrushchev proposed this idea to Fidel Castro whose country’s economy was in a slump, tensions were rising, attacks and assassination attempts had been made at him thus, he did not hesitate to side with the Soviets and instantly saw the strategic advantage. The two leaders worked together in secrecy throughout the late summer and early-fall of 1962. The Soviets shipped sixty medium-range ballistic missiles along with their warheads; necessary operating personnel, and launch equipment to Cuba without the United States knowledge.

In July of 1962, the United States discovered nuclear missile shipments were being made to Cuba. United States U-2 spy planes flew over the island, bringing back reports of construction and ballistic missiles .The CIA discovered that five thousand Russian military technicians were in Cuba, and various military weapons were being unloaded onto the island. Reports showed the presence of surface-to-air missiles and torpedo boats with ship-to-ship rockets. On October 18, 1962 photographs revealed that construction on the missile bases was occurring at a faster rate than originally thought. The first medium-range missile site would be completed within the next day and a half. The missiles were targeted at several U.S. cities and it was estimated that almost eighty million Americans would be killed, just minutes after the firing of the missiles.
Meetings were held to decide on how to handle these growing problems, debate after debate the meeting would conclude at a dead end. Every solution had a pro and a con that made executing plans very difficult. Meetings with the Khrushchev were held, and despite all the evidence presented Khrushchev declined that he wasn’t trying to set up missile bases that could be later used to attack the U.S.

In a meeting held, the members of the U.S council decided to create a blockade, and some even pushed for a military strike. Saturday, October 20, 1962 Robert Kennedy called his brother and told him the result. It was the president's choice; the committee could not reach a decision. JFK soon returned to the White House, and heard all the plans and the blockade was to be put in place. By Sunday, America's allies knew of the situation and special briefings were given to members of the Organization of American States.

President Kennedy wrote to Khrushchev explaining him that he knew better than to drive the world to nuclear chaos in which it was clear no country would win. The largest US force since D-Day was organized in Georgia and Florida and over one hundred thousand troops stood ready, bombers of the Strategic Air Command flew the skies, and one hundred and eighty ships were in the Caribbean. The next day, pilots flew over Cuba and snapped photographs of two operational medium-range ballistic missile sites while back in Washington, evacuations were initiating.
After a couple of days of tense stand off, Khrushchev send Kennedy two letters asking that if he removed his missiles from Turkey that they will remove theirs from Cuba, in addition the United States was never to invade Cuba under any circumstances. Kennedy and his counsel of advisors carefully analyzed the letters and after further debate they agreed to meet Khrushchev’s demands in return to end the tense standoff and to remove their missiles from Cuba.

Thus the Cuban Missile Crisis ended in peace, which is significant for a number of reasons. Of these reasons being the avoidance of possible nuclear war. If the United States had not met the Soviet Unions demands and entered into a nuclear war with the Soviet Union in 1962, the World’s history would be radically different. A war between the two world super-powers would have resulted in one winner, and the creation of a major dominant force in the world. Billions of lives would have been wasted as nuclear warheads were dropped on cities across the globe. Such war would have split the world in half; no country could have afforded to remain neutral and both Kennedy and Khrushchev would have destroyed each other before they surrendered.

With the limited technology available back then, scientists had no way of interpreting the lasting affects of a nuclear war, not only would it kill everything around it, but also it would leave behind deadly radiation that would have affected humanity for generations to come.

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Could someone grade this...provide a quick analysis of this essay I wrote in an hour...

[jeex]

pretty good.. A-/B+


a gramatical error;

"Khrushchev send Kennedy two letters asking that if he removed his missiles..."


that should be "sent".

[freestyler]

another problem:

"reason's" should be "reasons" - no apostrophe

also

"would make there nation look weak"

"there" should be their

[pacmania_2001]

I can't put my finger on exactly what the problem is but it seems that the sentences don't flow, like they feel very clunky in some parts.

What education level is this for? I would recommend maybe replacing some of the words in it for a more advanced version, an example being:

"The Soviet Premier, Nikita Khrushchev, thought that placing Soviet medium range missiles in Cuba could easily solve problems.

Change "thought" to "strategised" and also you have a grammatical error in that sentence with the phrase "could easily solve problems". Whose problems? You need to make this clear.

I'm also not sure about some of your conclusions, they seem contradictory. For example:

A war between the two world super-powers would have resulted in one winner, and the creation of a major dominant force in the world.

Which is then contradicted later on by:

Such war would have split the world in half; no country could have afforded to remain neutral and both Kennedy and Khrushchev would have destroyed each other before they surrendered.

and

With the limited technology available back then, scientists had no way of interpreting the lasting affects of a nuclear war, not only would it kill everything around it, but also it would leave behind deadly radiation that would have affected humanity for generations to come.

Also you have a grammatical error in the word "affect", I think in this instance it should be "effect".

The main thing that stopped the Cuban missle crisis was the threat of mutually assured destruction or "MAD". Basically no matter who launched first, both would be eliminated off the face of the planet as well as most of the rest of the planet.

Without knowing what education level it's aimed at I would give it a B.

[lordsmurf]

EFFECT ... a cause leads to a direct and identifiable change (effect)
AFFECT ... something is offset or altered (affected) because of another factor.

Similar, but not the same. This is from AP (Associated Press) usage.

"The Cuban Missile Crisis was the closest the world ever came to nuclear war" is a power sentence. Adding on "due to conflict between the Soviet Union and the United States" makes it very, very weak. Find a better place to put it in a following sentence or by merging with the next one.

Junior high class "A" or "B"
High school regular class "A" to "C"
High school honors class "B" to "F"
Community College "A" to "C"
University "C" to "F"

It has too many punctuation errors and spelling errors to be very good. Fixing those will make it a better grade

Things like "The Soviet Premier, Nikita Khrushchev" need only be a simple "Soviet Premiere Nikita Khruschchev" (check on the "e" or not on premiere, use a dictionary). Again, AP writing style here.

I agree with the above sentiments that it really has zero flow, and seems more like random facts. It looks like a 1-hour paper. This would be nice as a quick brief, but no more.

Some of the sentences are too long, too many stuffed ideas. Some cut off too quickly and take up two sentences when one would have sufficed.

It ended better than it started. You need a dune buggy to get over the roughness of the opening 3 graphs.

Too much passive voicing: "would be", "had been", "had met", etc. Sometimes it's unavoidable, but you could avoided many instances here. Passive is weak.

Yes, I'm a writer, and yes, I'm an ass when it comes to critiquing college papers. But that's how you improve, with lots of constructive criticism, though the maturity of the recipient isn't always there. Trying to help, but I know I'm rough. I've helped "C" and "F" students turn into "A" and "B" students several times through the years.

This is just on style. You'll have to be the one to verify your facts. Wrong facts will sink the grades faster than poor style.

[offline]

Do you mind posting the original essay question?

[SLK001]

With the limited technology available back then, scientists had no way of interpreting the lasting affects of a nuclear war, not only would it kill everything around it, but also it would leave behind deadly radiation that would have affected humanity for generations to come.

You make a statement in the first half of this amazingly long sentence, then contradict it in the second half.

To grade this, you need to tell us what level you have been promoted to in your grade school. Only spent an hour? Well, your paper shows it. I hope that the hour you spent on this wasn't because you were too lazy to begin this early enough to do the research and present a decent paper.

Did you really do this extemporaneously?

[Capmaster]

due to many reason’s

Should be "reasons". It doesn't belong to the reason. Use plural form instead of possessive form.

and despite all the evidence presented Khrushchev declined that he wasn’t trying to set up missile bases that could be later used to attack the U.S.

Double negative. Should read " ..Khrushchev declined that he was trying to set up ...".

interpreting the lasting affects of a nuclear war

"Affect" is a verb. "Effect" is a noun. Change it to "effects".

[edsmith77]

For a rough draft a pretty good start.
However, for an advanced type of topic / paper, there are way to many unsubstantiated claims. It would be better to attribute these to yourself based on research, literature, or data. Better yet is cite a source that makes your point for you that has already been published.

[Capmaster]

Good start kid. I have to give you credit for throwing it out there for all to pick apart. As you see, some folks love to insult. Ignore it since this is a public forum and you do get all kinds here.

I feel good that you're making an effort to improve a school assignment. It's refreshing to see that in this day and age where it seems not too many kids care one way or the other. Nice work

[lordsmurf]

. As you see, some folks love to insult.:

Who? Where? I see earnest critiquing going on. This is tame compared to journalism writing courses.

[Capmaster]

. As you see, some folks love to insult.:

Who? Where? I see earnest critiquing going on. This is tame compared to journalism writing courses.

To grade this, you need to tell us what level you have been promoted to in your grade school. Only spent an hour? Well, your paper shows it. I hope that the hour you spent on this wasn't because you were too lazy to begin this early enough to do the research and present a decent paper.

Now you and I can shrug off this comment, but this is very insulting. I think it was uncalled for. Instead of offering constructive criticism, it was all negative and demeaning. If someone came up to me after I read an essay and said that, he'd be examining the ceiling.

Now I hope your skin isn't too thick from this board Lordsmurf that you can't recognize an insult when you see it. I mean, give the kid a break. At least he's trying, and I think what he has was pretty good for just 1 hour's work.

[SLK001]

Insulting? Not really. I just stated what the original post stated (that he put together his essay in an hour). Reviewing the posts above mine will again show that the paper does show that it was put together hastily. I also hoped that the writer wasn't given two weeks to prepare this report by his teacher and then waited until the "last minute (hour)" to even begin it.

Having taught college technical courses while obtaining a Master of Science Degree, I would have given a 55 to 60 out of 100 for this work to a college student. But since the original poster failed to tell us his current educational status, I refrained from giving him a grade until this was known.

I can only guess that this youngster and Capmaster both go/went to schools where no one was failed, so as to not damage any of their fragile egos.

As for this quote:

At least he's trying...

it assumes facts not in evidence.

As for this quote:

If someone came up to me after I read an essay and said that, he'd be examining the ceiling.

after I had fully examined the ceiling, the author would be looking for his teeth, then examining the bars that were surrounding him.

[Capmaster]

Insulting? Not really. I just stated what the original post stated (that he put together his essay in an hour). Reviewing the posts above mine will again show that the paper does show that it was put together hastily. I also hoped that the writer wasn't given two weeks to prepare this report by his teacher and then waited until the "last minute (hour)" to even begin it.

Having taught college technical courses while obtaining a Master of Science Degree, I would have given a 55 to 60 out of 100 for this work to a college student. But since the original poster failed to tell us his current educational status, I refrained from giving him a grade until this was known.

I can only guess that this youngster and Capmaster both go/went to schools where no one was failed, so as to not damage any of their fragile egos.

As for this quote:

At least he's trying...

it assumes facts not in evidence.

As for this quote:

If someone came up to me after I read an essay and said that, he'd be examining the ceiling.

after I had fully examined the ceiling, the author would be looking for his teeth, then examining the bars that were surrounding him.

:P OK. Go back to bullying noobs ...you won't get anywhere with me. Anyone who starts listing his credentials to validate his posts is a pod and a rim-ranger in my book.

[SLK001]

OK. Go back to bullying noobs ...you won't get anywhere with me. Anyone who starts listing his credentials to validate his posts is a pod and a rim-ranger in my book.

Now that's mean! What's a pod? And what is a rim-ranger?

[Capmaster]

Just kidding I thought I'd throw a few out. A "pod" is like Kramer on Seinfeld. No further explanation is needed.

Rim Ranger = Rump Ranger, Rump Wrangler, Rim Robin, Anal invader, Bummer, Bum Burglar, Rear-Ender, you get the idea

Seriously,
I thought the kid was trying and needed some positive words. He showed the stones to post it here and subject it to all sorts of flaming. I was just trying to stand up for him a bit. It did need some polish, as my post pointed out.

[Anonymoususer]

ooooooo yess....


I have to say that i actually did write this in an hour and that i kind of threw it together....yes this is a rough draft...I will be improving it pretty soon....thanks for the comments, and I could care less about people "insulting" me... the criticisms actually help me...this is for an English 4 honors class...

[indolikaa]

ooooooo yess....


I have to say that i actually did write this in an hour and that i kind of threw it together....yes this is a rough draft...I will be improving it pretty soon....thanks for the comments, and I could care less about people "insulting" me... the criticisms actually help me...this is for an English 4 honors class...

You should take a look at this book if you have extra time on this assignment.

A fascinating book. Dovetails very nicely with the special Discovery Channel ran a few years back about how close we really were to World War III. Abso-*******-lutely scary.

[RabidDog]

I think all the conclusions reached are pretty thin. MAD would have wrecked western civilization but Africa and many other countries would have been relatively unscathed.
Did the US remove its Turkish missiles??

war between the two world super-powers would have resulted in one winner, and the creation of a major dominant force in the world. Billions of lives would have been wasted

explain ? no winners or two winners??
..

Thus the Cuban Missile Crisis ended in peace

didnt end in nuclear war, is about all that can be said

Yankee imperialists strike once again, at the heart of the fraternal brotherhood of socialist states
cut & paste 'n Google have a lot to answer for

[lordsmurf]

Now I hope your skin isn't too thick from this board Lordsmurf that you can't recognize an insult when you see it. I mean, give the kid a break. At least he's trying, and I think what he has was pretty good for just 1 hour's work.

Nah, this board is nothing to me. My skin is thick from life in general. I shrug off rough stuff and look for meaning if it, if any exists. There was something in what he said. Rough, yes. Vindictive, no.

I consider something an insult only when it's baseless or hypocritical. The comments that offended you had some meat on them.

I'll say for an hour, it's not horrible ... but I'm used to writing on short deadlines in the past. News is like that, so saying "I only had an hour" won't get much sympathy from me. Anyway, the assignment is not likely "what can you write in an hour", but rather "xyz assignment on xyz topic". That's how see it. Even saying "an hour worth" is just an excuse for being unable to spend proper time (whether from good reasons or laziness is unknown, however). If laziness, my advice is "get off your butt" and if a good reason all I could say is "that's life, and at least you got something done as best you could".

That's my outlook. More time, clean the style, and watch the technical and factual mistakes. Also watch out making assertions and conclusions that hold no water. Some of these come a bit close. I honestly had a hard time just reading it because of the roughness and mangled structure. Kind of hard to see what the point was.

I'd love to see the question. That makes it all sort of fit in place.

[Capmaster]

Now I hope your skin isn't too thick from this board Lordsmurf that you can't recognize an insult when you see it. I mean, give the kid a break. At least he's trying, and I think what he has was pretty good for just 1 hour's work.

Nah, this board is nothing to me. My skin is thick from life in general. I shrug off rough stuff and look for meaning if it, if any exists. There was something in what he said. Rough, yes. Vindictive, no.

I consider something an insult only when it's baseless or hypocritical. The comments that offended you had some meat on them.

I'll say for an hour, it's not horrible ... but I'm used to writing on short deadlines in the past. News is like that, so saying "I only had an hour" won't get much sympathy from me. Anyway, the assignment is not likely "what can you write in an hour", but rather "xyz assignment on xyz topic". That's how see it. Even saying "an hour worth" is just an excuse for being unable to spend proper time (whether from good reasons or laziness is unknown, however). If laziness, my advice is "get off your butt" and if a good reason all I could say is "that's life, and at least you got something done as best you could".

That's my outlook. More time, clean the style, and watch the technical and factual mistakes. Also watch out making assertions and conclusions that hold no water. Some of these come a bit close. I honestly had a hard time just reading it because of the roughness and mangled structure. Kind of hard to see what the point was.

I'd love to see the question. That makes it all sort of fit in place.

Good points. Sometimes a critique needs to have teeth in order to be effective. And I know what you mean about deadlines ....I get them too and deal with them just fine. And on looking at SLK's response today it sounded more like an uncle's advice than a flame.

I would have liked to see how the assignment was worded too.