Shift Change: A Short Story, Part VII

[Tommyknocker]

SCene opens inside the Forum Infirmary)

"I strongly advise you to get some bed rest." The infirmary nurse said, strapping the adhesive tape around Cap. "You have some bruised ribs, and need time to heal."

"I'll take it under advisement, Nurse." He said putting his shirt back on. Smurf burst through the door, armed to the teeth. "What you got, Partner?"

"It's Baldrick. They put the bag on him, but left one of their goons behind who says he knows where they are."

"We're gonna need back up, anybody home?"

"Doesn't look good. Ilsa says everyone's on Christmas vacation, not answering their phones, or can't leave their kids. Cobra and BJ_M made it in though. We flipped a coin, they lost, so they'll moderate the Forum while we try to rescue Baldric."

"Guess we got lucky."

"You are so naive." Smurf said, and flipped his two-headed coin in the air.

"You ask for volunteers?"

"Yeah. But I don't think you're gonna like what you got."

"Let's see." He walked outside the infirmary and saw the proverbial cross section of the forum: Young and old, male and female, all walks of life.
The only common thread among them was they each had a side arm and a rifle.

"On the contrary, this is exactly what we need." He walked over to Bazooka, Shadow Mistress, and Baby Boo. "I have something planned, but you all could get bloody doing it."

"Promise?" Shadow Mistress answered without hesitation.

"You sure about the location?" He turned to Lord Smurf.

"We weren't at first. But Ilsa volunteered to stay with the goon in case he was putting us on. I don't know what she did to him, but when he heard that, he changed his story real fast."

(Scene Change: The Warehouse District)
Bazooka walked out into the alley of the abandoned warehouse, he arrived at the back entrance and saw two guards, just like Capmaster said. He put a puzzled look on his face and stared around.

"Hey, you lost?" The first guard asked.

"Nope, but you are." Bazooka answered and shot him in the neck with a slingshot, and ran around the corner.

"You little--" The guard yelled, and chased him around the corner, while the second guard laughed out loud. "Stay here, I'm going to shove that slingshot up his little butt!" While he waited for his partner to return, he noticed two beautiful women come up from the opposite end of the alley. They saw him, squealed with delight, and waved for him to come over. He shook his head, and thumbed towards the door.

"Ohhhh." The both said, disappointedly, and started to turn away.
He started towards them, and they stopped as well and softly clapped their hands in anticipation. He quickened his pace, and they began jumping up and down, squealing even more. As he got close, he noticed that even though they wore a skirt and a dress, they each wore sneakers. He never could figure out today's fashion trends, he told himself, as he walked closer. Then he noticed they weren't wearing makeup, but their faces were covered with Vaseline. He was less than a pace away from them when he realized: women only take off their makeup and put on Vaseline and sneakers only when they are about to fight. It was too late.

Shadow mistress left fist shot out, catching him square in the chest. He swung at her, but she ducked. Baby Boo punched him the kidney, then kicked him in the back of his knee, and he sunk to one knee. She grabbed a handful of his hair and snatched his head to one side. It was the opening Shadow Mistress was looking for, she chopped him in the neck, and he crumpled to the ground in a heap.

"I'm glad you're on our side." Cap said, walking up behind them.

"I know. You guys ever stop thinking with your crotches, we're done for." They laughed.

"That was colder than a colder than a witch’s tit in a cast iron bra." He laughed. “Keys?”

“Got ‘em.” Shadow Mistress said, grabbing a set of keys from prone guard.
They all ran towards the now unguarded door. Bazooka met them there, carrying a broken baseball bat.

"Where's his friend?"

"Taking a nap. He still has to explain to his proctologist how he got a slingshot stuck up his butt, but that's a personal problem."

Baldric slowly came to. He was bound to a chair. The room was a large warehouse, empty and long abandoned. As his eyes adjusted to the light, he noticed the tall blond admiring herself in a full length mirror leaning up against a chair.

"So Defense, you decided not to cut it as a man?"

"What did you call me?"

"Knock it off. I called you Defense. I thought you ‘bought it’ months ago. You still have the same height, eye color, facial structure, don't know how, but it's you."

"Simple. When you started bouncing members off your forum for kidding around, I decided to cover myself, and sent in clones. It worked until you got smart and linked us to our addresses."

"All well and good, but what does that have to do with you sinking to kidnapping?"

"Simple. You're the only one in your little forum who knows what to do when your system crashes. When I 'punch your ticket' and crash your site, No one'll know how to bring it back up. I kill you and your site with one quick shot."

"For a drag queen, you are one sick bitch!"

"And you're one dead mofo!" He screamed cocking his pistol and pointing it at Baldrick's head.

********************
To be continued

[yoda313]

Hello,

What happened to Bazooka????

I'll have to reread that a few times later to figure out what was going on.....



Kevin

[Capmaster]

Beautiful work as always, Tommyknocker. I can't wait for the next installment

[tekkieman]

Hello,

What happened to Bazooka????

Kevin

Let's see...he left with the slingshot and a man and came back without his slingshot, and something about sticking it up his butt. The rest is bazooka's business. Who are we to judge his lifestyle?

[Capmaster]

Hello,

What happened to Bazooka????

Kevin

Let's see...he left with the slingshot and a man and came back without his slingshot, and something about sticking it up his butt. The rest is bazooka's business. Who are we to judge his lifestyle?

Don't ask, don't tell But the trend toward wooden objects is disturbing, to say the least

[bazooka]

A slingshot.....How primitive

[Tommyknocker]

That was only to get his attention and make him chase you around the corner, where you had your baseball bat waiting.

[Shadowmistress]

Excellent story tommy! I'm on pins and needles for the next installment.
Nice to see more characters in it this time. (Not for cap and smurf tho, cause they just love the limelight).

I feel honored to have had a part in that one.
I never realized how astute an observer you were.

Do you already have part 2 in your head? If not, I have some ideas for you.


By the way, vaseline? Um... I don't get it.

[Cobra]

TK is our forum janitor. He sees everything that goes on here, and rolls out the canvas when needed.

Couldn't do without that guy.

Is the last installment going to wrap this episode up, TK? I'm looking forward to it!

Cobra

[bazooka]

Another excellent job Tk.

Let's see...he left with the slingshot and a man and came back without his slingshot, and something about sticking it up his butt. The rest is bazooka's business. Who are we to judge his lifestyle?

Uh.......that is so wrong....

[lordsmurf]

Nice, again.

[Tommyknocker]

Excellent story tommy! I'm on pins and needles for the next installment.
Nice to see more characters in it this time. (Not for cap and smurf tho, cause they just love the limelight).

I feel honored to have had a part in that one.
I never realized how astute an observer you were.

Do you already have part 2 in your head? If not, I have some ideas for you.


By the way, vaseline? Um... I don't get it.

Oh, sorry about that. Most fighters put it on their faces when they are about to fight. It makes their face less likely to be cut if they get hit there. Sorry.

[Tommyknocker]

TK is our forum janitor. He sees everything that goes on here, and rolls out the canvas when needed.

Couldn't do without that guy.

Is the last installment going to wrap this episode up, TK? I'm looking forward to it!

Cobra

Yes, the last episode will wrap this up. Sorry I got a little carried away here. The moderators really ran up the body count this time.

[Capmaster]

TK is our forum janitor. He sees everything that goes on here, and rolls out the canvas when needed.

Couldn't do without that guy.

Is the last installment going to wrap this episode up, TK? I'm looking forward to it!

Cobra

Yes, the last episode will wrap this up. Sorry I got a little carried away here. The moderators really ran up the body count this time.

We did it for you, TK

[Tommyknocker]

Excellent story tommy! I'm on pins and needles for the next installment.
Nice to see more characters in it this time. (Not for cap and smurf tho, cause they just love the limelight).

I feel honored to have had a part in that one.
I never realized how astute an observer you were.

Do you already have part 2 in your head? If not, I have some ideas for you.


By the way, vaseline? Um... I don't get it.

PM me with your story ideas. As you saw in my first story, if I do use it, I like to include you in the credits as a co-author. Thanks.

[bazooka]

I am still trying to figure out if I am the one who got beaten or was it defense?

[Shadowmistress]

Me, you and babyboo were taking out the guards outside the warehouse. Nobody's dealt with Defense yet.
The story would play better if it said "Scene Change" right before where it says Baldrick woke up.

[bazooka]

Me, you and babyboo were taking out the guards outside the warehouse. Nobody's dealt with Defense yet.
The story would play better if it said "Scene Change" right before where it says Baldrick woke up.

Thank you

[Capmaster]

What wasn't mentioned is if that slingshot ended up being sold on e-bay for a bundle

[bazooka]

What wasn't mentioned is if that slingshot ended up being sold on e-bay for a bundle

The guard wanted the slingshot in his butt.

I thought I would oblige.

I thought it was sick myself.

Who knows what the guard did with it.

[Tommyknocker]

What wasn't mentioned is if that slingshot ended up being sold on e-bay for a bundle

The guard wanted the slingshot in his butt.

I thought I would oblige.

I thought it was sick myself.

Who knows what the guard did with it.

Sorry, Bazooka, I never meant to offend you. I clarified the story a little more, in the hope you would see you were only acting in self defense.