The 2004 New Hampshire Primary

[indolikaa]

John Gibson: Good evening and welcome to a special edition of The Big Story here on FOX News Channel.

Well, it's all over but the mass-duplicating. In a surprise landslide, DVD-lab has captured 19% of the vote tonight in New Hampshire. And while that may not seem like a convincing victory, it is, considering the nearest also-ran only managed to corral 11% of the vote. With me here in the studio is Rita Cosby, the host of Big Story Weekend on FOX News Channel. And from Snowflake, Arizona we have Indolikaa Khan joining us as well.

Rita, this is not the outcome I was expecting, and as we watch the folks from DVD-lab celebrating victory tonight at the Concord Motel 6 parking lot, one has to wonder what has happened to the technological landscape.

Rita Cosby: One has to wonder, John. Who would've thought that the consortium that invented, pioneered and licensed the most successful consumer electronics technology in history would get beaten down like a junkyard dog in Iowa Monday night. And now, a small upstart Internet company shows up in New Hampshire and send the big dogs home licking their wounds from what has been one of the more spectacular ass-beatings in the last few years.

John Gibson: An ass-beating is almost an understatement. DVD-lab is the poor man's Scenarist. Or honest man's Scenarist, depending upon how you look at such things. Nonetheless, what we have seen tonight is a small company who put a lot of effort into a fine product reap the rewards for their labor. Indolikaa, before we go any further I'd like to welcome you to the show tonight and I've always wondered something. A town named Snowflake in the state of Arizona must be something unique, since there aren't many places that you'd find snow in Arizona.

Indolikaa Khan: It has nothing to do with the weather, John. The town was named after two men with surnames of Snow and Flake. But since you brought it up, I'd like to point out that the thermometer outside currently reads 22°F, which is still many degrees warmer than what it must be at the Roxio Headquarters tonight. In fact, if you ever wanted to see what it would look like if Hell Froze Over, a guided tour of Roxio R&D department would be in order.

John Gibson: So you think the big loser tonight is Roxio?

Indolikaa Khan: Just one of many, John. But yes, I think Roxio demonstrated the age-old technology adage tonight: if it ain't fixed, go and **** it up some more. I realize that Nero wasn't far behind in the Shameful Display of Programming Code parade we saw tonight in New Hampshire, but at least they've had stable versions of software in the last few years they could hang their hat on.

Rita Cosby: Hi Indolikaa, Rita Cosby here. I wonder with all the attention on Roxio and Ahead that maybe the New Hampshire voter was truly disillusioned from the start.

Indolikaa Khan: Of course they were disillusioned, Rita. Not unlike the camper who asks for Charmin and gets handed a poison ivy leaf, New Hampshire voters were simply fed-up with having shite software shoved up their nose by the megacorporations. Now I'm not saying that DVD-lab is the Holy Grail of DVD Authoring, but the voter has finally been presented a choice that gives them choices. Voters no longer have to accept Full-D1 resolution with PCM audio, they now have real choices. And that spells trouble for the Big Two.

Sean Hannity: Indolikaa, Sean Hannity here. Always good to see you buddy. Hey, listen. Let's be honest. Tonight was a convincing defeat for the Liberal Establishment. No matter how you look at these results, what we saw tonight was the beginning of the end for Bill Clinton's political career. Am I wrong on this?

Indolikaa Khan: Right on the money, Sean. We all know how much time and money Bill Clinton put into the DVD-R camp three days before the Iowa Caucuses. Only yesterday investigators from the Congressional Budget Office released a report stating unequivocally that numerous foreign corporations donated heavily to the DVD-R Comrade! campaign, in clear violation of several thousand FEC regulations. The biggest abuser was a group of paranoid Princo owners known to support the operations of dvdrhelp.com. Now their donations not withstanding, there were other groups we can call into questions.

[i}Alan Colmes: [/i] Indolikaa. Wait a minute. Now, the same report you're questioning also singled out certain Right-Wing misdeeds in the Iowa Caucuses as well. Let's be fair and balanced here.

Rita Cosby: Right-Wing misdeeds, Alan? I don't see how handing out free DVD+R blank discs to voters leaving the polling places compares to all those Left-Wingers who handed out packs of cigarettes with DVD-R Comrade! bumber stickers plastered all over them to voters before they entered the polls.

Indolikaa Khan: Alan, consider the exit poll results we've already seen in New Hampshire. There's no clear answer other than people wanted change. 81% of those who voted for DVD-lab liked the fact that 'DVD' was all caps but 'lab' wasn't, 52% of voters support a Constitutional amendment legalizing animal pornography, 29% think Australians should be granted dual citizenship...

Sean Hannity: That is just wrong.

Indolikaa Khan: ...and wrong as it may be, Sean, it's a fact. I would also like to point out that 33% of voters think BHA Corporation makes a solid software package and would have probably supported it if it's DVD authoring capabilities were even remotely similar to DVD-lab. We also know that a solid majority of voters think they're should be more software programs that encode AC-3 accurately, but that same majority wouldn't give a rat's ass if the codec was legally licensed by Dolby Laboratories or not. And half of those same people supported the DVD-R format. So there's just no clear indicator of what New Hampshire residents were thinking.

Rita Cosby: Again. The people of New Hampshire have decided they wanted a change. You can run all the exit polls you want and you won't come up with any clearer answer than that. And looking ahead to South Carolina, and Arizona, and New Mexico, well I just think the DVD Forum is in trouble.

John Gibson: Agreed. And with tonight's announcement that Howard Dean is officially endorsing the DVD Forum, I don't suspect their prospect for victory has improved.

Indolikaa Khan: I think there's something else we have to consider here, people. Major Garrett reported earlier tonight that exit polling showed New Hampshire voters overwhelmingly supported the new FF-RW standard for CD-RW media. We can't discout the possibility that the DVD Recordable revolution may have left a percentage of the market behind, and the market is just fine with that. Now I have been saying...

Rita Cosby: I'm sorry to interrupt, Indolikaa. FF-RW?

Indolikaa Khan: Yeah, it's another evolution of the CD Rewritable standard. We began the burning era with your basic CD-RW, which could burn up to speeds of 4X. However, it became readily apparent that members of the vcdhelp.com forum were looking for much higher speeds and much cheaper media. So Philips licensed the HS-RW, that's High Speed Rewritable, and gave users a boost to 12X rewriting. Still the svcdhelp.com members complained that it was too slow. Complicating that issue was the fact that CMC could reliably produce the media, which removed the attraction for many forum-posting members to even login each night. Philips then announced the US-RW, that's Ultra Speed Rewritable not United States rewritable. And before you ask Sean, the format is readily usable in France.

Sean Hannity: And that's only because Tom Daschle needs the support of the left-wing, expatriate French labor union leaders in his home state to have a chance at winning re-election.

Indolikaa Khan: Those two extra votes aren't likely to make a difference. Anyway, with a 24X rewrite speed dvdrhelp.com users were starting to warm up to the idea of rewriting their SVCD collections. The tepid enthusiasm died when it was learned CMC and Princo were not yet able to unreliably reproduce such media. So Philips, not one to give up on CD format in general, proposed the FF-RW standard last month. Fuckin-Fast Rewritable discs will reach speeds of 40X, and in an effort to please the dvdrhelp.com anarchists, Philips has licensed the technology behind the dielectric media to CMC.

John Gibson: So you're suggesting that New Hampshire voters, having been fed up with the inconsistencies of the DVD Recordable formats, are regressing to more tried-and-true standards?

Indolikaa Khan: Absolutely, John. If for no other reason, the theoretical limit to DVD recording speed is about 16X, and since 40X is faster than 16X, there's just no advantage to pumping all of this money into an intermediate format anymore. With SBBAV around the corner, DVD is as dead as Howard Dean's sense of reality.

Alan Colmes: But what about the difference in quality between DVD and CD video?

Indolikaa Khan: It's a myth, Alan. Trevlac has conclusively determined that the human eye is niether capable of discerning the difference between properly-produced SVCD/CVD and DVD, nor able to appreciate the true beauty of interlacing fields. His research also shows that nobody truly cares about having to change discs two or three times during a movie. With the average man needing three trips to the refrigerator for beer and the average woman needing multiple trips to the shitter, there's just no reason to argue that cramming one movie onto a single disc truly serves any purpose.

John Gibson: And for the record, Indolikaa, where has your support been?

Indolikaa Khan: John, my formats of choice are VCD on CD-RW. That hasn't changed.

John Gibson: Fascinating. Well folks, we have to take a break. When we come back, we'll take a look at the upcoming Arizona primary, where voters will have to decide whether to label or not label their discs. We'll also consider an interesting caucus in New Mexico, where the burning question...

Sean Hannity: Oh that's horrible.

John Gibson: Ah, yes. No pun intended. The question is, are Sharpies safe for DVDs or better used as a substitute for inhaling lacquer. We'll be right back.

[Solarjetman]

Nice

[jeex]

wow.. that was enthrawling.. i wonder if they'll cover the dvd burning debacle;

recordnow max; proven reliability & compatibility

vs.

nero; sometimes it works, sometimes it doesnt.

[lordsmurf]

With the average man needing three trips to the refrigerator for beer and the average woman needing multiple trips to the shitter, there's just no reason to argue that cramming one movie onto a single disc truly serves any purpose.

Laughing so hard tears coming to eyes.

And I want a FF-RW disc too. I'm still using FS-RW format (Fukin Slow).

[trevlac]

Indolikaa Khan: It's a myth, Alan. Trevlac has conclusively determined that the human eye is niether capable of discerning the difference between properly-produced SVCD/CVD and DVD, nor able to appreciate the true beauty of interlacing fields. His research also shows that nobody truly cares about having to change discs two or three times during a movie. With the average man needing three trips to the refrigerator for beer and the average woman needing multiple trips to the shitter, there's just no reason to argue that cramming one movie onto a single disc truly serves any purpose.

Uh, this may be a bad interpretation of my results. Our 'resolution' test group only contained near sighted people who sat at least 12 feet away from their 19" TVs.

The movie length tests were only done on 3 year olds who either could not sit thru more than 10 minutes of a test clip, or who preferred to watch the same clip over and over (and over). Even if you normalize for the diaper wearers in the bunch, I'm not sure you can extrapolate the results to adults.

Besides, I always vote for Lyndon LaRouche.