The Good, The Used, The Previously-Enjoyed

[smearbrick1]

I was just sitting here (at home) thinking about the new and exciting ways car dealers market what we used to call "used cars".

Apparently it's no longer acceptable to sell a "used car". I'm assuming since everyone now sells "pre-owned cars" or "gently used cars" that if one were to attempt to sell someone a "used car" they may just get the cold shoulder.

When did our language become so soft?

Ok... since we want to call "used cars" - "preowned" or whatever you prefer, why don't we apply these terms to other items.

First, let's apply these terms to relationships. Now, most of you would never apply the term "used" to an ex-spouse (although I have seen a few that would qualify) or ex-significant other of some sort, but you could call them "previously enjoyed". "Pre-owned" doesn't really sound like any relationship I'd ever want to have been include in, so we can exclude "Pre-owned".

What about more tangible items? Ever heard of a "gently used" toilet or a "previously enjoyed" vibrator? How about a "as new" douche bottle? Not something I'd imagine any woman would want around. Then again, people surprise me now and then.

Speaking of sex toys... What do the adult stores do with the returned items? Are defective items returned to the manufacturer to be reconditioned or refurbished? Are the returns based on the customers... um... unsatisfaction put back on the shelf and deeply discounted at closeout prices?

Anyone ever wonder how the septic tank cleaner got into the business? Has anyone, as child, stood up and said "I don't want to be a fireman or a doctor. I want to clean septic tanks when I grow up." They weren't in my kindergarten class. Of course, I don't remember some of them standing up and saying "I want to be a complete ******* when I grow up" either, but I know a few who qualify for the job. Not only do they qualify for the job, with a little work, they could run the ******* company.

[lordsmurf]

These are the kinds of posts that keep me here.

[edDV]

Previously rejected (reason unknown).

Septic tank cleaner saw the $$$ opportunity, same as used ___ dealer.

[KBeee]

Actually " Previously enjoyed vibrator" sounds a pretty good selling point

[MOVIEGEEK]

Actually " Previously enjoyed vibrator" sounds a pretty good selling point

That depends on who used it.

[smearbrick1]

That depends on who used it.

I had a friend who went to a strip club featuring Jenna Jameson. She was selling popsicles... and guys bought them... and ate them...

Need I say more?