Best Pick Up Line

[ZAPPER]

Vice is nice, but incest is best!

[BJ_M]

did I hear Arkansas? Incest ? Pine Trees? Kissing cousins??

next thing you know this thread will drift to GUNS

[Ripper2860]

did I hear Arkansas? Incest ? Pine Trees? Kissing cousins??

next thing you know this thread will drift to GUNS

So, basically -- a post about a shotgun wedding between cousins in the piney woods of Arkansas, would pretty much deliver on your expectations for this thread and signal that it has reached its' rightful conclusion??

[ViRaL1]

You ought not to dunnat. He's jussa lil boy.

[the bomb]

Somebody explain to me how you go from pick up lines to incest?

[ZAPPER]

Somebody explain to me how you go from pick up lines to incest?

You ain't from round here are ya?

[ViRaL1]

I can see it now.

Guy: 'Who's your daddy?'
Girl: 'He's your daddy too!'

[the bomb]

Somebody explain to me how you go from pick up lines to incest?

You ain't from round here are ya?

I guess not.Somewhere along the way somebody lost their train of thought and headed right for the gutter

[Capmaster]

So it's a typical OT thread.

[SLICK RICK]

Somebody explain to me how you go from pick up lines to incest?

You ain't from round here are ya?

I guess not.Somewhere along the way somebody lost their train of thought and headed right for the gutter

Threadjacking at its finest.

[bazooka]

You have the most beautiful eyes. They remind me of the sea and I could easily drown in them.

[doppletwo]

"If you like my body and you think it's sex. Baby you should let me know."

--Rod Stewart

This one works for me all the time.

[ViRaL1]

'Once you go OTPW, you'll never go back.'

Not one I'd ever use this one, but I've heard it before...

'I'd walk a mile over broken glass to suck the **** that ****** you last.'

Not sure if that's going for flattery or nausea.

[doppletwo]

Um, I don't know a lot of the acronyms what's OTPW?

I type um and uh way too much.

uh.

can't think of anymore pick up lines

but I do know that most women don't appreciate it when you say

THIRD EDIT: "Boobies, Boobies, Boobies"

or "Damn look them titties"

Part of that edit this did make sense without the third Boobies.

[ViRaL1]

OTPW = Off Topic Post Whore.

[ZAPPER]

I have alway had remarks made to me about my eyes. For some reason girls seen to think that I have special eyes or something. Even my mother inlaw tells everyone that I have bedroom eyes and warned my wife not to fall for them. Any how as a young man I was somewhat shy and didn't quite know what to say when a girl or even an older woman would say to me that I had some pretty eyes. Now let it be known that I am white as race goes, and while no angel I am not a hardcore racist. I do give most people at least a small chance before I start to hate them and until the issue ever even comes up I don't usually even consider race and the only reason that I bring it up here is to add to the effect of the story. For some reason the black girls really comment on my eyes. I don't really know if they actually like them or if they know that I am easily embarrased and they are having fun at my expense. After years of of taking this abuse I finally came up with a reply that I thought would even the playing feild. So one time at the counter of a fast food restruant the young black girl behind the counter says "Oooh you got some pretty eyes" And this was my chance to have some fun, so I say "Oh yeh? Well come home with me and you can gaze into them all night" Pretty good huh? She says "Oooh My Mama wouldn't like that." Now I am feeling pretty good. Twenty years of my torment is about to be cleansed away on one poor unsuspecting victom. So I say "Well your Mama doesn't have to find out now does she?" At about this time a much larger and older black woman that was stuffing my order into the bag turns around and says "Oooh you do gots um pretty eyes! But I am her Mama! And you is gonna have to be good to me first before I let you be good to my baby!" It was like electric shock! My joints went weak! I almost lost control of my bowles! I was stupified and horrified! If I didn't have two of my coworkers to catch me I would have hit the floor. I think that my coworkers drug me to a chair I really don't remember. If I did not actually faint it was the closest that I had ever come to it. About twenty people got the laugh of their lifetime and I got a lesson on "keep your mouth shut stupid"

[ViRaL1]

[doppletwo]

did I hear Arkansas? Incest ? Pine Trees? Kissing cousins??

next thing you know this thread will drift to GUNS

At work when every we get in to a semi-femine topic of comversation and it gets a little gay.

I just say, "Last night I was hitting my gun with a hammer'

Makes me feel macho again. Guns and Tools. Restore you masculinity quicker than anything.

But the Village people have guns and tools so maybe not.

EDIT: Good story Zapper.

Second Edit: Viral I am a OTPW, now. I need to seek counselling. If this site goes down I don't think I will be able to take the withdrawl.

[Ripper2860]

[bazooka]

I have alway had remarks made to me about my eyes. For some reason girls seen to think that I have special eyes or something. Even my mother inlaw tells everyone that I have bedroom eyes and warned my wife not to fall for them. Any how as a young man I was somewhat shy and didn't quite know what to say when a girl or even an older woman would say to me that I had some pretty eyes. Now let it be known that I am white as race goes, and while no angel I am not a hardcore racist. I do give most people at least a small chance before I start to hate them and until the issue ever even comes up I don't usually even consider race and the only reason that I bring it up here is to add to the effect of the story. For some reason the black girls really comment on my eyes. I don't really know if they actually like them or if they know that I am easily embarrased and they are having fun at my expense. After years of of taking this abuse I finally came up with a reply that I thought would even the playing feild. So one time at the counter of a fast food restruant the young black girl behind the counter says "Oooh you got some pretty eyes" And this was my chance to have some fun, so I say "Oh yeh? Well come home with me and you can gaze into them all night" Pretty good huh? She says "Oooh My Mama wouldn't like that." Now I am feeling pretty good. Twenty years of my torment is about to be cleansed away on one poor unsuspecting victom. So I say "Well your Mama doesn't have to find out now does she?" At about this time a much larger and older black woman that was stuffing my order into the bag turns around and says "Oooh you do gots um pretty eyes! But I am her Mama! And you is gonna have to be good to me first before I let you be good to my baby!" It was like electric shock! My joints went weak! I almost lost control of my bowles! I was stupified and horrified! If I didn't have two of my coworkers to catch me I would have hit the floor. I think that my coworkers drug me to a chair I really don't remember. If I did not actually faint it was the closest that I had ever come to it. About twenty people got the laugh of their lifetime and I got a lesson on "keep your mouth shut stupid"

No offense, but please use paragraph breaks. It is too hard to read in it's present form. It tends to make others not read it.

[Epicurus8a]

Gees, this up to 7 pages already... Did anyone submit the following:

"Let's play circus! You sit on my face, and I'll guess how much you weigh."

(My apologies if this is a repeat.)

[pacmania_2001]

"Be different, say yes"

[ViRaL1]

"Be different, say yes"

That's just crazy enough to work.

[ZAPPER]

"Want to ride on my handlebars" <While twisting my mustache>

[bazooka]

That's just crazy enough to work.

You must have been watching Sgt. Bilko lately.

[the bomb]

"Be different, say yes"

Good one! Its a winner.

[bazooka]

"Be different, say yes"

Good one! Its a winner.

I guess you thought my eyes line was cheesy, since you did not comment.

[the bomb]

"Be different, say yes"

Good one! Its a winner.

I guess you thought my eyes line was cheesy, since you did not comment.

It wasn't cheesy at all, I just saw it. I'd say thats a winner too. Looking into the eyes gets their full attention.

[pacmania_2001]

Guy: "Do you want to dance?"
Girl: "No"
Guy: "I think you misheard me, I said your arse looks fat in those pants"

[ZAPPER]

After this thread goes to hell I can't wait to see the "How many ways have you been shot down?" thread.

Like my all time favorite "Get lost creep!"