Opposites?

[Guest]

[flaninacupboard]

jeez, even northcat will admit that would stop being fun long before a friend saw you!

SHE LOOKS PROUD

[Capmaster]

jeez, even northcat will admit that would stop being fun long before a friend saw you!

SHE LOOKS PROUD

Like the saying, that's one you'd need to roll in flour to find the wet spot

[flaninacupboard]

or "Fart and give me a clue"

[Capmaster]

or "Fart and give me a clue"

Maybe .....maybe the "last woman on earth" scenario, but only after I had worn out my right hand

[flaninacupboard]

jeez, can you imagine you and her alone at the end of time

I'd hide all the food, i reckon about....... six weeks of starvation would do it?

[Capmaster]

jeez, can you imagine you and her alone at the end of time

I'd hide all the food, i reckon about....... six weeks of starvation would do it?

I think I might say "Oh well, so much for the human race", and trick her into sitting on me A moment of crushing pain, and then ......the Olsen Twins

[flaninacupboard]

pop down a banana skin, lie back and wait for oblivion!

[Capmaster]

pop down a banana skin, lie back and wait for oblivion!

Banana skin is poisonous?

[flaninacupboard]

eh? no, i mean put a banana skin on the floor, lie down next to it. she'll slip over on it and -bang- you're a gonner.

[Capmaster]

eh? no, i mean put a banana skin on the floor, lie down next to it. she'll slip over on it and -bang- you're a gonner.

Ahhh ..got it. Man, I'm slow this morning. Here I am on my second cup of coffee and I still needed you to explain it

[flaninacupboard]

haha, it's because you were up so late on your Libretto! with a quiet little machine like that your wife doesn't notice your browsing the forum in bed, i'll bet.

Coffee, now there's an idea. it's a quarter past three and i've only had one cup.

[Capmaster]

haha, it's because you were up so late on your Libretto! with a quiet little machine like that your wife doesn't notice your browsing the forum in bed, i'll bet.

Coffee, now there's an idea. it's a quarter past three and i've only had one cup.

I'm an absolute coffee fiend. I think I got into that habit in college. I drink it all day long. I have three cups before leaving the house to go to work. Once there I brew an 8-cup pot for the morning and an 8-cup pot for the afternoon. Then at home I have one before dinner and one after. And not a single cup of unleaded among them

[flaninacupboard]

that's a lot of coffee! i have a cup of tea when i wake up, one, maybe two cups during the morning, one with my lunch, usually one in the afternnon if i'm not too busy to make one, one when i get home and one when i go to bed. all teas are sometimes exchanged for coffees, except the first of the day, that has to be tea - no exceptions.

[jeex]

i'm with ya flanin.. if she were the last woman on earth i'd teach myself yoga (will ferrell style).. if you know what i mean.

[Capmaster]

that's a lot of coffee! i have a cup of tea when i wake up, one, maybe two cups during the morning, one with my lunch, usually one in the afternnon if i'm not too busy to make one, one when i get home and one when i go to bed. all teas are sometimes exchanged for coffees, except the first of the day, that has to be tea - no exceptions.

I usually drink less of it on days I don't work. I think I need so much of it to keep me awake since my alarm is set to 4:45am. Without coffee I'd be asleep. Even with it, if I have a meeting right after lunch I have to struggle to stay awake - especially if the room lights are dimmed and there's an overhead projector running ...with the soothing fan noise .... ZZZZZZZ!

[northcat_8]

....I'm not saying I wouldn't.....but the circumstances would have to extremely dire......EXTREMELY DIRE.

[rhegedus]

....I'm not saying I wouldn't.....but the circumstances would have to extremely dire......EXTREMELY DIRE.

Just slap her thighs and ride the wave in

[flaninacupboard]

the only ride i'd do is the taxi home!

[rhegedus]

the only ride i'd do is the taxi home!

Isn't there an 'in' missing from between 'is' and 'the'?

[flaninacupboard]

you think she'd fit in a car?

[northcat_8]

....I'm not saying I wouldn't.....but the circumstances would have to extremely dire......EXTREMELY DIRE.

Just slap her thighs and ride the wave in

I like to surf....doesn't everyone

[Doramius]

you think she'd fit in a car?

I don't think she'd fit on a bus. She needs a flatcar on a rail to even adjust her stomach so her panties can make it on. Not that she really needs panties. Her rolls cover it up on their own. Need to spelunk that cavity just to find out if it's there.

[Capmaster]

you think she'd fit in a car?

I don't think she'd fit on a bus. She needs a flatcar on a rail to even adjust her stomach so her panties can make it on. Not that she really needs panties. Her rolls cover it up on their own. Need to spelunk that cavity just to find out if it's there.

With a full bio/hazmat suit with self-contained oxygen. It would still be an emotionally scarring event

[Cobra]

I was thinking she could do with having her stomach stapled so she loses weight, but then I thought how difficult surgery would be.

She should therefore have her jaw wired, and be supervised doing increasing amounts of exercise every day. There needs to be something to help the chronically obese tackle their problems and stay sorted.

Cobra

[DVD_Ripper]

So that's where the saying "roll 'em in flour and look for the wet spot" comes from.

But... gonna need a paper bag, 1/5 of Jack Daniels... hmmm... labotomy

[flaninacupboard]

it's not hard to limit what you eat. i mean really, all these fatass fuckers "oh, it's genetic. oh, it's my thyroid. oh, it's my metabolism" and they just plain lie "i didn't eat for a week and i exercised every day and didn't lose a single pound!" that's actually impossible. they need to put down the spoon and the jam jar and STFU.

[rhegedus]

I was thinking she could do with having her stomach stapled so she loses weight, but then I thought how difficult surgery would be.

She should therefore have her jaw wired, and be supervised doing increasing amounts of exercise every day. There needs to be something to help the chronically obese tackle their problems and stay sorted.

Cobra

You can do quite a lot with an endoscope. One method is to put bags in the stomach and fill them with saline so that they fill space and it takes less to feel full. Or, the stomach can be stapled from the inside to reduce its size.

The problem is that the stomach is just like any other muscle - stretch it and it will adapt...

[Capmaster]

Another one that's even a little more drastic than the stomach stapling is the partial removal of the small intestine. That's where food is absorbed and if they take out a good length of it you can eat all you want and it won't get absorbed. Of course you'll have chronic hershey-squirts :P

I worked with a guy named Roy who had intestinal cancer. They had removed most of his small intestine. This poor guy had to consume over 5,000 calories a day just to stay the same weight. His wife had to shop for products with coconut oil because that seemed to keep the weight on him the best. This guy was skinny He looked like a stick figure come to life. I felt so sorry for him because I knew in a few years he would be dead from starvation because they had to keep cutting pieces out of him and each time it made it harder for him to stay alive. I haven't heard from him in years, but I'm sure he's dead by now.

[Doramius]

My wife has an aunt like that. She doesn't even know how much of her intestine is left. However, she's in her late 50's and is doing okay. Though it seems like she's in the Hospital every month or so.

Obiesity can be helped in many ways, but many people don't do anything about it. Anybody remember Jerry Lewis. He was a bean pole for most of his life. He now has some disease where the medication caused him to gain weight like crazy. He was extremely upset with it, but continued to take the medication. He also talked to several other doctors while do heavy exercise and workout training. Finally, he's lost a ton of weight and looks somewhat normal, again.