I've done it now.

[Doramius]

Congrats, but wait until 9 or 10 weeks to be sure at the ultrasound. My wife had a few false alarms. My wife actually went like 2 or 3 months without seing "Aunt Flo". Went to see the doctor and he said her cycles and system look fine, she may have just been very light for those months. The next time she did go crimson, it WAS very light and nothing wrong. You could basically tell when she should've been on the rag, but you tell her that and she'll bite your head off.

[stiltman]

next time she did go crimson,

So that's what the movie Crimson Tide was about

[Capmaster]

Some things can cause a woman to miss it. My wife missed a few times because of too much exercise, strenuous dieting, etc. Scared the crap out of me because she had gotten a tubal ligation after our second one, and the odds are staggering low on getting pregnant, but the odds are not zero. It wouldn't have been the end of the world, but we had decided before we even got married that we'd exactly replace ourselves, and then stop. Even though she's Catholic, she's not that by-the-letter that she'd ever resort to the rhythm method, or use nothing at all. Not fair to the kids to have that many. No litters of 10 or 12 for us

[Guest]

just breast envy

I was thinking of Misti Dawn with hearts to dot the "I's"

give them a star trek name, you know you want to!
"it's poo, jim! but not as we know it!"
"i am sensing something wrong dianna"
"your beard's coming through nicely will"
etc

no?

God damnit Sulu!!How many times do I have to tell you to take the trash out?!

[flaninacupboard]

"scotties turned into a right slut, i tell ya, she canna take n more"

[Capmaster]

Or: "Worf - get the hell in this house and finish your homework"

[Doramius]

My wife is a Fertle Myrtle. She's on the shot and that almost scared us as she had a miscarriage on that. She even got her shots on time or a tad earlier. It's pretty cool because she's not a B**ch for 3 months except for one week right after she gets the shot. Odd thing was we had tried for 3 1/2 years before we had our son. I won't go into details, though I was overproducing and it caused an increase in heat which caused low mortality rate. I had surgery done and according to the doctor I'm still overproducing, but I'm not overheating the equipment and my mortality rate is where it should be. My wife blabbed about the whole surgery thing to my co-workers at the time. I was a bit embarrasssed by it, but when I got my count after the surgery, I posted it on the whiteboard at work. 225 YEE-HA! I think 120's are normal. I was producing in the 300s+. Aparently it runs in the family and I'm very prone to have Fraternal twins or even triplets according to the doctor. That's a bit scary, so we're hoping just to have one more and then call it quits. My wife is worried we have the litter on the next try.

[stiltman]

sounds like you need to stop wearing tighty whities

[flaninacupboard]

isn't that -start- wearing tighty whities?

[stiltman]

Nope, tighty whities, keep "things" to close to your body, thus too much heat and too much heat kills other things....

Best to go with boxers or natural

[northcat_8]

My wife actually went like 2 or 3 months without seing "Aunt Flo". Went to see the doctor and he said her cycles and system look fine, she may have just been very light for those months. The next time she did go crimson, it WAS very light and nothing wrong.

Damn that sucks...no one likes to eats plain tacos.


And you guys need to stop talkin about Doramius and "tighty whities"...that's just plain wrong. I read this page from the bottom up and I was thinking tighty whities - hanes cotton high cut ass huggin, hello kitty panties on a dark skinned, jet black haired badass female and then I read on up and find you are talking about Doramius I think my eyes have whiplash.

[indolikaa]

And you guys need to stop talkin about Doramius and "tighty whities"...that's just plain wrong. I read this page from the bottom up and I was thinking tighty whities - hanes cotton high cut ass huggin, hello kitty panties on a dark skinned, jet black haired badass female and then I read on up and find you are talking about Doramius I think my eyes have whiplash.

You want a wine cooler?

[northcat_8]

Sure...it woudl fit right in with all the beer I've drank tonight.

[Doramius]

Not that it matters too much, but I only wear boxers. Hangin' free. If I wore jockey's then I'm sure my count would be severely dropped. My overheating was due to something natural. We almost thought my son was going to be twins. My wife started showing big, early. It was just 1, but my wife was induced 10days early and our son was still born at 9lbs. 10oz. My wife could have crried longer, but the doctor didn't want her to have a caesarian for her first child. His size was also the reason she was induced early. Doctor said she was carrying well enough to go a week or so after the due date, but my wife looked like she would blow any second. She also complained a lot about her skin itching and hurting because it was stretching so much. She doesn't really have stretch marks though. 90% of them cleared up in the first few weeks. No skin sag too.

[thayne]

Hate to burst all your bubbles, but parenthood sucks! Wait till your little yard apes are between 13 and 16 then tell me how great it is! Seriously...

For those who don't have kids, get yourself a good dog and forget about it!

[pacmania_2001]

Hate to burst all your bubbles, but parenthood sucks! Wait till your little yard apes are between 13 and 16 then tell me how great it is! Seriously...

For those who don't have kids, get yourself a good dog and forget about it!

Thats my plan. If I ever want to play the parent I'll just take the cool Uncle role to my brothers potential future kids.

Read an article recently about the cost of having kids. They placed it at AUS$1.2 million per kid. No thanks!

[thayne]

It's not just the cost, if it were only that I wouldn't mind. Mainly it's the ungratefulness that really pisses me off.

Everything's great when they're young, but wait till the first time your little bundle of joy gets the balls to tell you to go to hell when you tell him to get off the farking xbox for 5 minutes and clean his room.

[Doramius]

At that point you taser his A**. If a cop can do it to a 9 year old, parents should have the right to do it to their ungrateful & rebellious teens. I bet they'd have a little more respect after that. By the way, I'm all for capital punishment. If you're 35 and caught stealing a car, you should lose a hand. If you try running from the law, you lose a foot, too. If you steal my car, I get to kill you.

[DVD_Ripper]

Here's a few choices:

Pinto (from Pinto Colvig) the first actor to do Bozo's voice and portray him in promotional appearances.

Larry (from Larry Harmon) - one of several actors who had played Bozo

Bob - (Bob Bell) starred as Bozo in the Chicago area on WGN-TV

Seems fitting...

If its a girl... beats me.

[Doramius]

Here's a few choices:

Pinto (from Pinto Colvig) the first actor to do Bozo's voice and portray him in promotional appearances.

Larry (from Larry Harmon) - one of several actors who had played Bozo

Bob - (Bob Bell) starred as Bozo in the Chicago area on WGN-TV

Seems fitting...

If its a girl... beats me.

Odd name, Beats Me? I wouldn't admit it if I said, "My little girl, Beats Me." Makes you sound like a wuss, or a perv.

[SatStorm]

The best time for a Man to turn a Father, is about 37 - 38 years old. (In my country at least)
So, I have 7 - 8 years more to live!

Of course, I'll have to change girlfriend : She is 28 and recently start talking for Kids... "Bad luck with me" I said her. "I won't do it before my 37". Just for the record, now I'm 30.
And because of our 6 year relationship, she knows that "mistakes" from me ain't happens! (especially on this matter).
So, we are ready to devorce now because of this. It was fun but the end is near, we both know it....

Anyway:
My next girlfriend gonna be younger than me, that's for certain. Having relation with women of your age is unfair for both!

[Doramius]

The best time for a Man to turn a Father, is about 37 - 38 years old. (In my country at least)
So, I have 7 - 8 years more to live!

Of course, I'll have to change girlfriend : She is 28 and recently start talking for Kids... "Bad luck with me" I said her. "I won't do it before my 37". Just for the record, now I'm 30.
And because of our 6 year relationship, she knows that "mistakes" from me ain't happens! (especially on this matter).
So, we are ready to devorce now because of this. It was fun but the end is near, we both know it....

Anyway:
My next girlfriend gonna be younger than me, that's for certain. Having relation with women of your age is unfair for both!

Trust me, you want the kids earlier. I wish I had mine earlier. I'm just not as agile and quick as I was 5 years ago and even then it would have been rough chasing after a kid. When they get older, you can throw them out just before you retire. You don't want them around when you're trying to relax and live off the government you put so much money into without a return until you were practically ready to kick the bucket.

[DVD_Ripper]

The best time for a Man to turn a Father, is about 37 - 38 years old. (In my country at least)
So, I have 7 - 8 years more to live!

I'm 43 now and have three children... 1, 2.5, and 5 years of age...

Every day I tell myself that i'm too old for this S@%$.

Have 'em now... your young, you've got the energy to chase 'em around... You won't (or won't want to) when you 45...

And if you have 'em earlier... you may be lucky to see your grandkids...(and laugh at your kids)

[DVD_Ripper]

Looks like Doramius and I are both feeling our age

[stiltman]

Can't believe this, but I have to agree with Doramius

Just having my first, I wish I would of done it when it was really easy staying up all night and going to work the next day Also it would of been nice to have him out of the house sooner. Plus, you get set in your ways by time you reach the late 30s and it's more of a hassle to change it after doing certain thing for so long

[Doramius]

Looks like Doramius and I are both feeling our age

like Rod Stewart once said, "I wish I knew what I know now, when I was younger.....when I was stronger." I should've started having kids right near the end of college. Now I know how Willey Coyote feels chasing after Road Runner.

[tekkieman]

The best time for a Man to turn a Father, is about 37 - 38 years old. (In my country at least)

Seems that there are a lot of us "older" dads around. Mine is 1 1/2, me 39. Of course, we didn't plan to wait. It just took 13 years of trying!

While it is true that you are likely to have more energy to keep up having them earlier, it's nice to be older, set in your career, financially stable, etc., etc., as well.

[stiltman]

Of course, we didn't plan to wait. It just took 13 years of trying!

That's A LOT of practising

[tekkieman]

Of course, we didn't plan to wait. It just took 13 years of trying!

That's A LOT of practising

I'm not sure it made perfect, but it made "pretty damn good"!

[Doramius]

I agree with the stability part, but if I people waited until they were completely stable, you'd find our species wiped out faster than if we all went Gay.