Are you a golfer?

[Midzuki]

An article about golf @www.encyclopediaofstupid.com needs to be written.

[Conquest10]

Somewhere I had a link to a Robin Williams story about golfs creation. It is worth tracking down.

Its from his Broadway special.

And only they could invent a sport like golf.
Here's my idea for a ******* sport.
I knock a ball in a gopher hole.
- Like pool? - **** off pool.
Not with a straight stick, with a little fucked up stick.
I whack a ball, it goes in a gopher hole.
- Oh, you mean like croquet? - **** croquet!
I put the hole hundreds of yards away.
Oh, **** of ya ! Big fun, yeah!
- Oh, like a bowling thing? - **** no!
Not straight. I put shit in the way.
Like trees and bushes and high grass.
So you can lose you ******* ball.
And go hacking away with a ******* tire iron.
Whacking away, and each time you miss you feel like you'll have a stroke.
**** that's what we'll call it, a stroke,
cause each time you miss you feel like you're gonna ******* die.
Oh great, oh and here's the better part. ****, this is brilliant!
Right near the end, I'll put a little flat piece
with a little flag to give you ******* hope.
But then I'll put a little pool and a sand box,
to **** with your ball again.
Ay, you'll be there cracking you ass, jacking away in the sand.
- And you do this one time? - **** no!
18 ******* times!
That's my idea of a sport!
The manly sport of golf,
where you can dress like a pimp and no one will care.
Even a gay blind man would go: "Oh, dear Christ!"

[starwarrior29]

I play the Tiger Woods golf games on the gaming consoles but never played it in real life.

[lordsmurf]

I think I've played "real" golf maybe 5 times, and Putt Putt maybe 10-15 times. it was fun to do a few times, wouldn't make a habit from it, however.

[j4gg3rr]

Guess it depends on your definition, for me I'd consider anything that requires physical skill to be a sport. For example I'd consider pool or shooting darts a sport.

Having been club champion at Pool Darts and Golf, I consider all 3 to be activities for the following reason.

All 3 require the drinking of beer to make them any fun at all.
Where as drinking in a true sport would see you come last everytime.

[ricky1756]

My feelings about golf are the same as Mark Twain's, when he called golf "A nice walk ruined"

[IMoL]

I am a golfer. I only play 30 or so rounds a year these days, but I have been as high as 200 rounds a year.

Several things spoil a lot of golf for me:

1. Carts. Contrary to popular opinion, carts do NOT speed up play, they actually slow it down.

2. Speed. Particularly in the USA - I don't know why Americans seem to want to take 5+ hours to play a 3 hour game. I currently live in Sweden and we can comfortably play 18 holes, walking and carrying in 3-3.5 hours. Every time. Even on weekends. I suspect this problem is party the fault of 1. above.

3. Idiots who think they are Tiger Woods, but have a golfing ability closer to that of his Tiger headcover. A contribution to 2. above.

IMoL

[offline]

They should legalise golfing. All these underground golfers are a concern.

[Midzuki]

I didn't know the gays still are illegal in the land of Oz.

[Bjs]

Handicap : 16
Golf clubs : Wilson firesticks ... including 1 and 2 iron
Favorite : 1 Iron, straight as a die and long

Hates : Detest woods, and people that say "your only 2 over after 11 holes" ... you know what happened next, lol, but then I parred the par 4 13th, and its the hardest on the local course...

Funny: Whats a bunker, its been years since I landed in one of those things

Tiperary tournament : 58 strokes, sand greens
Last win : 2002, Southwest slopes, nsw, au, tournament or tournaments champion ... by 1 point over pro

Never bet that I can not hit the same knot in a tree 3 times in a row, I won that bet

I still practice mid and short range for special events such as ambrose, and the holden scramble, but my days of hitting long screamers are done (infernal neck strain they call it)

[TheFamilyMan]

My take on golf is it's like learning to enjoy tobacco: I never did it enough to learn to enjoy it (thankfully), and the process of getting there was too miserable to make it worthwhile.

Unfortunately most of my in-laws' men folk love to golf which has made for some awkward and miserable situations (for me) during family outings.

[Midzuki]

Golf is not that bad, after all. Golf irons can be useful when you need to


or



someone.

[impmon2]

I'm ore of a putt-putt player. The only one time I played golf, I clipped the ball and it somehow went about 100 yard backward and landed in the parking lot after denting a few cars.

I don't watch gold anyhow. not much fun when waiting about 5 minutes between each putt. NASCAR now that's more like it!

[dadrab]

I'm late getting in on this one. Sorry. Been away.

Watching golf isn't so bad if you're watching great players. I've been to the Masters 16 times. Augusta National's a beautiful course manicured to perfection. You'll never see anything like it.

I started playing golf at age 12. My oldest friend in this world lived across the street from the country club in my small home town. He and I played every day after we finished mowing grass (we did it to earn money). As we got older and got real after-school jobs, we still found time to play several times a week. Older still, and we had real jobs during the summers - yep, every day. We even played 2-3 times a week through most of the winter months although February play could be damn cold (even in South Carolina).

Off to college, so no more golf for a few years, but I got sucked back in by friends in the professional world who live for it. So, I played seriously at it for a few more years.

Finally, I got to the point were I knew I'd never get any better, so I stopped. Man, the money I saved. 8)

Still, I can take my old sticks and post a mid to high 80s score if the occasion arises. That's OK with me and most of the people I'd play with. I can even humble a few folks who fancy themselves "good."

Make no mistake. Golf IS a sport. The skills required to consistantly hit the ball well put it squarely in good company with many other sports, although not as physically taxing as basketball or football. Golf is easily as good an excersize as baseball (except for the catcher or pitcher positions); more than bowling or shooting pool or several others.

Being a good golfer requires more practice than most folks will ever put into it. It can be a maddening game and the more pissed off you become, the worse you hit the ball. That's the funny part about it - and I mean damned humorous. There's nothing like watching a normally nice guy turn into a stark-raving lunatic over the course of 18 holes of golf.

So, all you golf ney-sayers out there, just go play a round. It won't take but one. You'll gain a whole new respect for the game. You may not like it still, and that's OK. I can certainly understand that.

It's not for everybody.

[rogerbromen]

Can you tell me an online source to acquire, purchase, or just download golf video clips in .avi format that might show the complete golfers swing from various positions--preferably for PGA tour or other professional players?